Pull at the scabs, and the wounds will re-open
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Well, although I fully agree with KAW, I do think I need to have a well-deserved grieving period to experience all of my pain, frustration, and anger so it does not haunt me in the future. I can only heal this way. Once I get through this, I never want to go back to it (although a bit unrealistic), so I'm allowing the feelings come a little hard ... Well, I don't know that it's all that constructive. When I ask what my goal is, I know this delays it. But, I think, in the long run it will help ME. I am going to slow it down now, though. I've had enough for a while and want something a little light.
Keep in mind that you don't want to turn these talks into a pattern of what is to come as it will eventually be preceived as you won't be able to let it go and heal. If she starts to feel like you will keep re-opening the wounds (hers as well as yours) , then she will start to drift away again.
