Karen1. I know a couple of single guys and they just don't get the sex part of a R. Too much like mommas boys or goody-two-shoes doctrine hammered into them for too long of a time.
One very nice guy has his own ideas of what is appropriate and decent. He doesn't talk about sex much but what he does say can be summed up in "he just doesn’t get it" as in he thinks sex is way over rated.
His big problem is he is not flexible enough. If it isn't his idea, isn’t with in his definition of normal, it isn't worth much consideration.
If he would ever go back to dating, and he admits missing out on a life-time of potential happiness with one woman he dated but was too slow to act, that woman would have to just gently and lovingly push him into a corner to get what she wanted. Maybe after showing him there is more than one way to do some things, he might have liked it. I am just assuming your H has some of these bachelor traits.
I know from the women talking here, you want the man to take charge and be the leader, some (the long time bachelors) men have had it hammered into them that certain things are not appreciated by women. Reading this forum tells me other wise.
