A few more thoughts on taking the kids on a vacation to Boston while W would be with OM, these after yet another lousy sleeping night. What with my mom coming, I could make the same argument ("we'll see her over here and so don't need to go to Boston"), saving a bundle of money, which might then be used to go someplace cheaper that W also likes, hopefully preventing her from seeing OM. We are invited for a week to an island here, which with my 3 weeks of vacation is a significant chunk of time, in comparison with which Boston is an expensive luxury.
For the D, I turn 50 in early December (when I would finally like to have clarity, after more than three years of no physical contact or affection). There is a 6 month waiting period here, so I would need to file in early June. Should I give her notice a few weeks ahead? It seems like a fair warning is appropriate. The notice would be short, something like "Dear -, After seeing that things are not improving in our marriage, despite various efforts and patience on my part, I now agree with you that a D is a good idea and plan to file in about a month. Sadly, your Luke".
Beyond wanting this loneliness to end, I have only a few thoughts - maybe I could move back to the States, to a different job and much better money (while the W wants to stay here), set up a web link to see the kids, be here (Sweden) a week a month, that my being around is important for my son, that when we would sell the house following the divorce I could require/ask the new owner to let me rent the small apartment in the basement and so have some continuity for the kids, who could visit me there.
Sad shards -
Luke
Me 49 W 44 S 13 D 9 W left marital bed Feb. 6, 2004 1st bomb Nov. 2004 2nd bomb fall 2005 W has affair starting in Dec. 2005 W 'inadvertantly' gives me a copy of part of a love letter to OM 3rd bomb Dec. 2006 Affair still ongoing
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
