An interesting new twist has come up - but I'll start with the background first, which is that he kids have summer vacation. We had told my parents (in their 70s) we would visit them this summer, which they have wanted us to do for a while. W commented that she doesn't like being in their house as it is psychologically stifling, but that she did want to see Emily Dickinson's place in western Mass, and seemed generally interested in road trips in New England (my parents live near Boston).
Now my mom wants to spend 10 days with us in early June, so we would see her first, on this side of the Atlantic. My W doesn't really like my dad, so she now proposed that just the kids and I visit my folks instead. Of course, this would then be a perfect opportunity for her to be with OM, and in fact she called him the same day she made this proposal (the phone records the last 20 numbers called). It seems insulting to be a babysitter for the kids while W is with OM, doesn't it, though of course I do not know this for a fact.
There are various responses - not go to Boston with the kids, go someplace else that W likes, insist W come along to Boston, have my Dad visit here instead also, etc. What do you think I should do? I have problems accepting the 'let me shack up with Hunk here while you take the kids, thanks'.
More generally, W hasn't changed much. Still no touching at all. She got mad one day when I asked her where she was going just as I came in. I noticed that being nice makes her nicer, so I bring her tea in the morning again, turn the other cheek, again and again and again. So instead of not talking, not bringing her things, I swallow the pain and anger.
W recently said one of her favorite adjectives is 'wayward' and one of her favorite writers is D.H.Lawrence.
Still thinking that D may at least end this useless suffering on my part - I will not see another woman while we are married - and could let her reap what she has sown (which I let happen, admittedly).
Beautiful high pressure weather here, a Baltic thing, nearly 70, lovely lacy reflections on the wall from the sun sparkling off the water in the mornings -
Luke
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
