Lisa, Ellie, Nicola, Lissett, Fig, Cinders, BND, Was2Sad, Christy, Always, Bis, Thanks for the lovely posts. So nice to wake up to such thoughtful words.
BND, that was a great post, I appreciate it. Yes, you are so right and when I am not a blubbering head--case I so relish the fact that my efforts will pay off in spades. Last week my darling 12 year old son told me that he has a girlfriend. It was his secret to me. Not to his father but to me. It made me feel so special and privileged,
Lissett, I'm sure looking into your pretty face is like a breath of fresh air (send me pics! altheamerb@yahoo.com).
Figola! I hope it gets a little easier. Boys are wonderful but they are hard. The fact is it doesn't matter if it's boys or men, I just don't get those XY's, they're a mystery. I like your race analogy.
I was in the doctor's office yesterday and picked up a COSMO and started reading about the difference in the male and female brain and why women remember things in the emotional and the analytical part of their brain whereas men remember things in the mostly in the analytical part of their brain and that is why women experience things so much more emotionally and literally feel things deeper while men can process information without so much emotion and therefore can let stuff drop more easily (i.e. don't hold grudges).
Women also trend to sense danger or trouble more quickly than men which is an advantage on some levels but can also lead us to see trouble where there isn't any. They give an example of why men will get lost and not pull over to ask for directions--they aren't being stubborn but rather are so focused on problem solving and reading the map that they don't even realize they are lost. They also say that men have a better sense of direction...
It was interesting. Overly generalized I think and tended to be somewhat sexist but I think there was a lot of truth in parts of it.
Well, H and I were supposed to meet today to discuss the settlement and his travels and all kinds of other things but I have a child home sick today so once again it is postponed
I was tidying up and came across a list of H’s. He is a meticulous list keeper--he's done it all our lives. Always on Yellow legal pad paper and blue pen and he crosses off stuff as he does it. Most of it was crossed off but I could read through the scribbles. The list must have been left when he was here taking care of the triplets while S12 and I were in Florida.
It was very revealing in a symbolic way. At the top of the list was something about finishing a paper. Second was "Jackie" the next several items were work/job/research related. Then "Jackie pictures" then shopping list, then at the VERY BOTTOM was "call kids" and also "Althea..." couldn't read what that one said. As was always my suspicion we are literally at the bottom of his list of priorities.
We used to make fun of his father for his weekly calls because it was always so much like he was just checking us off his list. Non emotional, just an obligation he needed to take care of. How amazing it is that H has become so like his father.
I talked to H today. Asked him to come get S12 and then pick up kids from school and he agreed. He told me about the COF meeting and said it was demoralizing. Said that one of our old friends treated him almost with anger and hostility and it was "unsettling and weird." Of course I know why everyone there doesn't like him anymore and why it seems "they have already judged me and decided what to do." He doesn't get that the people who were once our friends are disgusted by what he has done and perplexed and don't like him anymore.
Anyway, H will be here soon to get my boy and I better get stuff ready.
