Tam...It makes me wonder now...are we enabling you to continue in this self-destructive course by being here to pick you up???
I am not suggesting you sugar coat anything...but by the same token if we come here and pick you up time and again...are you REALLY learning the lessons...maybe if we all pulled back...gave you "space"...you might WANT to hear what we have to say...much in the same way that a MLC'er reacts to things...by us hand-feeding you are you pulling away and doing what we say not to...doing what YOU WANT to do instead of what WE KNOW you should be doing...
I guess I don't understand this...when I was faced with the very same issue of losing my H forever...I heard the advice given (btw, my posts got maybe 2 or 3 responses and NEVER locked one up)...I acted on the advice to the best of my ability...the last thing I wanted to do was to seal the coffin...I don't understand if you REALLY DO GET THIS...WHY WHY WHY are you continuing to do all the things we have lovingly advised you not to, have sternly advised you not to, have beat you over the head about doing...Tam I really don't get it...
I am really considering let you fly solo for a bit...and am thinking the others might understand where I am at...and when YOU REALLY REALLY DO GET IT...AND YOU ARE REALLY REALLY READY to work on YOU...we will be here...
I am not trying to be mean, insensitive, or unkind...but I feel we are enabling you...and I feel that until you are too the point of truly wanting to make the changes you need to do that WE ARE ALL just wasting our words...I know you don't think so...but then your H probably doesn't think so when he is listening to you or ignoring you...he probably feels he is doing the best thing for himself (even though it isn't working)...
