I don't post much anymore because there isn't much to tell. H and I are still piecing but your posts made me get on this board and share with you "stuff". First of all, you don't need to beat yourself up about "making a decision" make a decision NOT to make a decision today about anything so permanent. Sweetheart, I feel for you. I've been exactly where you are. I hated being there but I hated looking at my H and know that HE was responsible for putting me where I never wanted to go. But you know what? As cliche as it sounds, time does heal. My H and I separated for 10 months, but I'm now home and things are good. They aren't the same, but in some aspects, it's better for me. I've actually become more independent. Not because I'm trying to punish him or anything such as that, but I make decisions of where we go or what we do, if he wants to join in, great, if not, I'll get a girlfriend to go rather than forego my want all together. Before, if my H didn't want to, it was a done deal because I wanted to be with him. I was totally co-dependent. Take this time to grow. I know that you love your H and your H loves you, so give it some time. I mean real time. I'm two years into this and trust me, it does get easier. So many wise posters on this board told me the same thing and I thought well they must not had it as bad as me. Some did, some worse, but they were all right. GIVE IT TIME. Let it go. The more you think about it the more junk you have to get over. Keep busy, love yourself, love your family, and the rest will fall into place. I promise!
