I emailed H yesturday and told him that if his mom only knew about what he was doing she would know that history is repeating itself again and that I was not like her mother and will no longer be in a loveless marriage. H's father has been unfaithful all through their marriage and he is also an alcholic. My H even has a step brother out of wedlock. I wrote him that I have given him 8 months of space to figure things out and that if he truly wants to be w/ OW than he needed to end things w/ me forever. I knew I would not get a response and I did not expect one. Every now and then whether it registers or not, I will send him notes to let him know how I feel. I said that sadly enough his staying overnights was really not affecting me like before b/c I have become numb. I said I have taken all the meaness and disrepect that I was going to take. I know I posted the question of should I or not have my daughter sleep w/ me now that H is staying in another room, well I thought about it and came to the conclusion that this will be how I set my boundaries (since just stating them is not working), w/ my daughter in my bed I am letting him know that when he is thru w/ the OW, then he can come back to sleep in out bed. Can you believe I am feeling sorry for the selfish jerk b/c the futon he is sleeping in is very hard and uncomfortable???
The girls did not want to go to church w/ me last night so I waited until H got home and asked him to stay w/ her unless of course he had plans on leaving again (nicely). I also,but sarcastically told him I would be back early enough for him to leave just in time for his booty call. Strangely enough he was in a very playful mood! I forget at times when he is like this it is when he feels guilty and he way of apologizing. I am really trying to do a 180 for me by sticking to the stated boundaries and show him I meant what I said. Again this morning he reinerated that he was not leaving his house!UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
