Am I starting to REALLY detach or is it just that I don't care anymore???? Last night my H starts to fumble around his closet and was already dressed like he was going out and was really not trying to hide it too much I suppose w/ all the racket b/c he woke me up as I told him to to take his work clothes and stay out the entire night ( this was not in an argumentive tone by any means). As our earlier discussion of the day was that I wanted him out of the house but he wouldn't budge. So, when I opened my eyes and looked at him he all of a sudden stopped like he was trying to hide the clothes that were in his hand and that is when I told him to get clothes for the rest of the week too. But let me back up, when I first mentioned him dressed to go out(w/out asking that is), he (lied) said that he was hungry and getting food. The strange thing about all of this is that he took his sweet ol time coming in and out of the room, turning on the light that asked kindly to turn off and let me sleep. You see, I was showing him it was not bothering me that he wasn't going to come back. In the meantime, he playfully? kinda was taking my sheets off from me and trying to take the pillows I quite get if he was trying to start a fight or just trying to be playful. My instict b/c this is how he is was that he was hoping or waiting for me to ask him to stay or ask him to come to bed (something my old self would do). He was saying I ought to just come and sleep here
Anywho............. I am glad b/c God is giving me the strength.... I would normally feel sad, but I don't.. jsut a nice calm feeling while letting go
