Yes, absolutely, moving out is a very empowering step. Bigger action than any of the passive stuff I mentioned. My bad. Truly, shame on me for not being more positive there. A well-deserved smack!
The passive stuff is worth mentioning, though. It has been NMs pattern throughout this, even before SO went so whack, to have things "happen" to her as though she has no control over how SO affects her life. He has been coming and going from her house, her bed, her personal space, her time, her lips, her embrace, her dinner table, her couch, her (old) new apartment, her phone line, her closets, and so on, without NM ever really putting any boundaries in place. I see the same pattern occuring now that she is OUT of the house, and it is troubling.
NM -- Ellie has suggested some GREAT boundaries for you. May I add that you consider those prerequisites to him kissing you, sleeping under the same roof as you, hanging out with you, or dining with you as well.
