Reasons why we may not want them back

[HalfMissing]

fig, I remember when H and I were dating 23 years ago, he inherited $4K and used the money to buy a computer instead of a car he needed to visit me. In our first apartment, I put my foot down and insisted he had to move the computer out of the bedroom because I would wake up in the middle of the night and see him on it. For the last 17 years or so since we got a house, he gets up at 4:30 am so that he can go into the computer room to log on for a few hours and would often let the family oversleep so that he would have more time on it alone. The only time I ever woke up with H in my bed was on vacation. My H would often leave out slinky outfits for me to wear and then would be asleep and unwakable by the time I returned from the bedroom to put them on because he just had to get up at 4:30 for his computer time. 20 years of rejection for a computer gets to you. The irony is that I switched my major so we would have more in common and now do computer programming for a living.

[always_14]

I second Angelica...

And think this thread is good, for healing and grief.

My H was a kind and generous man. He had his weaknesses, his faults. So did I. None of them hurtful.

My family and friends thought he was a prince, wished we could clone him.

Now, I think he is possessed by the Devil. Am actually afraid of him.

So sad. So very, very, very sad.

[fig]

I shouldn't laugh I mean...this board is like crack to me but if it were between getting freaky with a hottie and checking out the MLC board...I think I might have to logoff!!!

[goal]

I hope not Chicki...

[chicki]

goal what is your thread title under? I ws curious as how you deal w/ your H since he has such personality similarity traits as mine- r u still living together? Whats up w/ that turning us down for sex when the signals were there beforehand (flirting,foreplay,etc)? OR is it just in part their way of controlling and making us feel bad as usual.

[outtaluck]

1. Contempt if not barely hidden hatred for my family...with no good reason.

2. Whiney...complain about the most mundane things

3. Bitchy...

4. Talked some nasty stuff about her friends behind thier backs....the same ones who now support her...if they only knew.

5. Always used to rush through our times out....never relax and enjoy dinner, for instance....eat and go.

6. Jealous...oh the fights we had about such meaningless stuff...same stuff she would do...but if I did it it was wrong.

7. Petty....would hold a grudge for ever over the stupidest things.

8. It always had to be her way....if she did do anything that I suggested it was done with resentment...so why bother?

9. Never supported me.... any wack brained idea she had got my full support...when I talked I could just see she wasn't interested. Reminded me of that movie with Tom Hanks...and they are stuck in an elevator...and Toms character is talking about some deep life changing stuff....and she's looking through her purse going "where the heck are my tic tacs!!"

10. Ohhh...that whole OM thing...the seperation...the lies she now tells...etc...

[Struggling_Husba]

I should add to my initial post that I do still love my wife and want her back.

So who's the crazy one?

-SH

[outtaluck]

Crazy right there with you, SH

Despite what I wrote...I still love her and want her back...no doubt in my mind.

I wrote on that other thread about why we DO want them back.

Those things mostly make up for all the bad....

[Cinderellaman]

I'm afraid that I can't make a list for my H either....

He was a wonderful man, maybe a little egocentric at times, but I didn't mind, I loved that the attention went to him.

Even during his MLC he is having a hard time being nasty....he is the one of the kindest MLCers around I think...

I suppose this is what attracts OW to him...he is a good man !

I love reading what you all have to say....this thread is fun !

[nickyf]

I too struggle to find reasons to not want my husband back. Pr-MLC he was the most wonderful husband a woman could ask for.

Nicky