Ok, true or false. If a guy has to pee really bad, like 1st thing in the morning, is it hard and/or impossible to have an "O?" This is a serious question. Thanks.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
Ok, well then I guess here's the scenerio. Once awhile back when we were still having major problems, he didn't "O" which is crazy for him not to. However, keep in mind that he would "at the drop of a hat" previously b/c we pretty much never had sex so when we did, well you know. Anyway, he didn't "O" and then said it was b/c he had to pee. Then later that night, he got real upset and told me that that had never happened before.
Well, it happened again yesterday a.m., keeping in mind that now things are going very well for us, and we are having sex constantly and he's on an anti-depressant-maybe it takes longer for him to "O?", but he didn't "O" and then said it was b/c he had to pee really bad. Anyway, I said to him that it really bothers me when he doesn't (not mentioning why - the above) and he said seriously, babe, I just really had to pee and he never did seem to get upset about it and is still fine this a.m. He was actually even very affectionate at one point yesterday which was a HUGE step for him/us.
Am I worrying about something I should just let go? This truly bothers me b/c I've never known him to have a problem w/ this -- could it be a combo of things or what do you guys think?
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
The anti-depressant does weird things to a guy's little friend. One thing I've found while on it is that having to pee makes it a lot harder for it to stand tall, and a so-so erection is harder to get an O with. If I'm on Cialis as well, though, and have a good erection, then having to pee puts me on a hair-trigger.
Is he nice and firm, or only so-so?
Also, the anti-depressant itself can keep you from getting an O, even if you manage to get hard. Again, Cialis makes that problem go away for me.
Summary: he should ask his doctor if Cialis is right for him.
a fine and enviable madness, this delusion that all questions have answers, and nothing is beyond the reach of a strong left arm.
Seems firm enough to me. I guess I'm thinking maybe, since we're ML all the time, it's going to take longer for him to "O" than before and if he had to pee, well, he couldn't wait any longer? And add the anti-depressant and it takes even longer??
I just hate all of this -- before the D bomb, I wouldn't have worried about whether he was having an "O" or not, it was never a problem. Maybe I need to quit thinking so much about it. I'm just still so insecure in our R and trying to make sure things are good for him and that he stays happy, etc.
Oh & he did make the comment that "I am doing new things & he wonders where I'm getting my ideas from" Must be doing something right? Right?
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
I would say you are more insecure than anything else. Just enjoy the fact that you are actually ML (what I would give for that!!)
My H can't O if he needs to pee - its just a no-go situation. Also the AD is a BIG block so the combination of the two would definitely do it I would think
Chill out and just enjoy the fact that he is actually talking to you, letting you know these things and you are in fact ML - wow!!!
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Thank you, Hey! I had read somewhere that your H was on the AD's too so I was hoping you would read this too.
This month is going by way too fast though -- he leaves May 1 for his year deployment. I can only thank God again & again that things have worked out the way they have. I know it's the DB'ing & my faith, but not sure EXACTLY what "changed his mind." I do know if I hadn't found this place & kept begging & pleading, he would be long gone by now, but I still have no idea what truly changed his heart/mind.
I'm still just enjoying having H "back" -- no R talk, who knows when I'll even get to that -- there is the issue of OW/EA, whom I think he still talks to,but is just a "friend" and I have made myself just let that go for now. Anyway, wrong forum for all of this, but thanks for your input. It made me feel A LOT better
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
I'm glad I could help. After all, isn't that what we are all here for - to help each other get through this maze?
And, yes, I am sure he is still going through some emotion (I know my H is and he tells me he is (which is good) When you think about it, this was someone they were involved with physically and/or emotionally. Would you want them to just forget about them? Most of us would say "YESSSS!!!!!" but, on the other hand, wouldn't that just tell us how insensitive they are, and we don't want that. So, we all have to be a little more patient and show them how much better off they are having us around than the OP
here's a little twise on an old saying (but it seems to apply to all of us on here) Patience is a virtue that carries a lot of "wait"
Take care
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Cadesmom wrote: ----------------------------------------------- Ok, true or false. If a guy has to pee really bad, like 1st thing in the morning, is it hard and/or impossible to have an "O?" This is a serious question. Thanks. -----------------------------------------------
If I have to pee really badly, then I can either get up and go, or get up and give up. For me, it doesn't happen often though.
The real challenge is hitting the porcelain target when you have a serious erection ...
All the best, -NOPkins-
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
Must be doing something right? Right?