What a great and horrible day all in one. I was so happy to have him here. All day I longed for him to say I want to come home. But I knew that wasnt going to happen. Heck he just told me two days ago that he doesnt want to be married anymore why would I expect him to change his mind so fast. Its just me fantasizing I guess. God I miss him. I got in the shower this morning while he was here and I was really hoping that he would come in with me. How dumb am I. I just wish I could get over him, but there is just something about him that keeps me wanting him. I just want him to come home. I wish he could see that it would be better this time. Dont worry I never conveyed any of this to him. I was myself all day and his friend. Right after he left tonight I had to run to the bathroom so I could cry. It breaks my heart when my son stands on the porch with his arms across saying daddy I dont want you to go. I was feeling the same way but I never let on of course. Will I ever get through this. Is there any chnace for us. I guess I will just have to wait and see. Thanks for listening. heather
