Another thing - I don't often post song lyrics but I LOVE these!!! OK, the song is about Bush's refusal to sanction gay marriage, BUT it was also written to encourge people to not give in - I love it!
Your back's against the wall, There's no-one home to call, You're forgetting who you are, You can't stop crying.
It's part not giving in, And part trusting your friends, You'd do it all again and I'm not lying.
Oh-whoa-oh, oh-ooh, Oh-whoa, oh-oh-whoa-ooh.
Standing in the way of control, You live your life, Survive the only way that you know.
I'm doing this for you, Because it's easier to lose, And it's hard to face the truth, When you think you're dying.
It's part not giving in, And part trusting your friends, You'd do it all again but you don't stop trying.
Oh-whoa, oh-oh-whoa, Oh-whoa, oh-oh-whoa.
Standing in the way of control, You live your life, Survive the only way that you know, know.
Oh-whoa, oh-oh-whoa, Oh-whoa, oh-oh-whoa.
Standing in the way of control, We'll live our lives. Because we're standing in the way of control, We will live our lives. Because we're standing in the way of control, We'll live our lives. Because we're standing in the way of control, We will live our lives, lives, lives.
Ooh-ooh-ooh-oh, Hey, yay, hey, hey.
Your back's against the wall, There's no-one home to call, You're forgetting who you are, You can't stop crying. It's part not giving in, And part trusting your friends, You'd do it all again but you don't stop trying.
Oh-whoa, oh-oh-whoa, Oh-whoa, oh-oh-whoa.
Standing in the way of control, You live your life, Survive the only way that you know, know.
Bomb (ILYBINILWY, don't want to be married)Sept05 Seperated Sept/Oct 05 Oct 06 - H recomitted July 11 - I am now a WAW.
I wanted to share this song with YOU as you've REALLY been an inspiration to ME and many otheres here & here's praying we can ALL sing this too one day: You're Still The One = Looks like YOU made it JJ
I went there in 2005, the weekend after H moved out, my friends took me to try and cheer me up. Then H and I went last year but it was the start of my own depression. This time I'm hoping it's 3rd time lucky!!!
But it's just SO NICE to be able to make plans for 6 months in the future knowing H will be her with me :). it's been a long slog, at times a horrific rollercoaster but well worth it.
Bomb (ILYBINILWY, don't want to be married)Sept05 Seperated Sept/Oct 05 Oct 06 - H recomitted July 11 - I am now a WAW.
But it's just SO NICE to be able to make plans for 6 months in the future knowing H will be her with me :). it's been a long slog, at times a horrific rollercoaster but well worth it.
You lucky lady!
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
One weird thing - I've been having nightmares about Bestival (where we are going in Sept, see previous post).
I wored it out that so far I have been there twice, once 2 days after H walked out and the second time when he had only just recomitted. In these nightmares I feel lost and alone in a big crowd of people, and that's exactly how I felt both times at Bestival.
I was worried for a bit, then realised it's because it's only been a couple of weeks since I've felt truly "there" in my M. I've only just started to feel that we have the ingrdients for a happy M. I am still a little fearful that another bomb could come from nowhere, but that fear is getting less and less. In recent weeks I've been introduing back some "old me" things, like budgeting and healthy eating. Of course I am scared that these could cause problems. But the way I am going about these things now is not the old way, it's more flexible and less staunch. H is agreeing with me on them so far, I have said if he doesn't like something he has to say, and I make sure I check things with him now rather than bulldozering him and telling him that's the way things are and he has to like it. I am putting over to him that I have ideas but I am more than happy to negotiate if there are things he's not so keen on. So far so good, wait and watch.
So I suppose I'm just taking the first steps into that happy future, I know I have it now, my worry is maintaining it. I'm not sure I'll ever get to a point I can fully sit back and relax, but I'd love to get to a point where I only have to worry about my M say once a month, rather than every day. I don't mean not be considerate etc, I mean I'd like the DB'ing to be more automatic for me, then say do a monthly review with myself and ask myself if there was anything I'd done/said over the past month which could have come over as bad, ask myself if H had done more compromising than me, just a health check really. I don't intend to sit down with H and have regular, scheduled R talks, I'd like these to be more spontaneous (H prefers that too).
Just journalling really, it's funny to feel "normal" after 18 months of watching what I say and do. Got to be patient and get used to normal and accept that I've changed and so has H. (yes it's my old fave, the P word!!!)
Hope all well and remember the way of the DB'er is long and hard, many don't do it at all. everyone here is to be congratulated for being willing to put the time and effort into saving their M.
Bomb (ILYBINILWY, don't want to be married)Sept05 Seperated Sept/Oct 05 Oct 06 - H recomitted July 11 - I am now a WAW.
