1-Stop the cycle of compulsive lying (possible?)...I have brought up counseling, which he flatly rejects. Are there other options?
I think you guys will both have to go to C eventually but I also do not think he is ready yet either. Seems to be still doing the old Flip Flop.
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2-Respect our vows and me at all times in all places...don't do or say anything he wouldn't do or say if I were standing next to him.
A definite Must
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3-Return to activity in our religion...LONG road there--he's facing excommunication.
Could be a lot harder for him to do than you think. Guys have this little thing called PRIDE and anyone looking down on that causes a huge problem in regards to the healing process...
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4-Be open...prove to me there's nothing to hide by providing access to email and phone accounts, tell me when something happens he knows would concern me.
I think this one might be going a little too far. remember you are trying to gain his trust as well as make him understand that you do trust him. By snooping you ruin all of that. Now the being open part is valid but the rest is what I would be concerned about.
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5-Look for new employment opportunities...the company he works at now is owned by a crook. Not exactly an atmosphere that inspires ethical living.
Do not know about this one either. Have you ever voiced your opinions about his job and the employer? Just curious. But as a boundry it might be going a little to far for now.
Ben 32 STBXW 29 3 kids (D1,S4,SD8) (1 dog 5months) Status: Fighting for the Kids.
"The only thing we know about future developments is that they will develope."
