First I want to thank God for this forum...it has literally saved my life. I was in such a bad state before I found this place and the DB books.
My story starts on our 20th anniversary...Valentines day of all days. I guess the day was too much for my wife and she couldn't keep up the "act" anymore and told me that I wasn't a good husband or father...that she loved me, but not like a husband...more like a friend. Well...it didn't really hit me...I thought we'd have to work some stuff out but I didn't think it would ever get to the point of breaking up. It hurt me so bad to know that she was so unhappy...I really felt like I was the worst husband ever. Still, we exchanged presents...I got a pair of gummy handcuffs (wtf??) and I gave her a pot of roses...that ironically died after two days...its still there...dead and all...and I still water it..like our dead relationship. It was the first major snow storm that day and we never put snow tires on the car. The car had a heck of a time getting around and couldn't even get off our street. I pushed that car four blocks to the main road so that we wouldn't miss our Valentine dinner. For some reason that dinner meant so much more to me that day. And things were pleasant...I swear I saw that same ol' twinkle in her eye. SO you know what I did right? Thats right...Pour on the I love you's and smother her to heck...ugh, bad move I know. It progressed from lets be friends and still have sex...to I want you out so I can clear my head. I'm not out yet, have to the end of April...less she changes her mind again.
I post in the MLC because thats now what I think is going on. She started going out drinking with friends and would say that they have so much but she has crap. Their husbands give them everything... Well I would but I'm not financially able to...she always seemed so satisfied before. She said she gave me hints...but what the heck is a hint gonna do for me....come out and tell me you're not happy and I'll do everything I can to make things right. Not now when you feel "dead" inside.
I don't know...I'm so confused..I do know she has another guy. Don't know if its physical (she swears no) but they talk for hours on the phone...and what I overhear makes me sick. I know he's an older guy and I sort of suspect he's married or somehow involved. It hurts to hear her sound so happy and giggly talking to him. Its a good thing I don't know who he is cause I'm afraid of what I might do. ( and I know...its not worth it...but still)
Anyway...I think I'm rambling on too much. My head isn't really working right now, but thanks for listening.
With all due respect.if she is playing teenager on the phone with another GUY, why are YOU leaving?? Kick HER ass out. Stand up, man!
