While I consider some of her medical are valid reasons for doing something or not doing other things, moving to a new house she would still have knee problems. So why not fix the knee problem now. If not now, what would a new house offer other than being wheel chair accessible.
Lil, I was seeing some "drama queen" and some reality with the knee problem.
So how do I incorporate my approach on a long term basis?
First I had to give up trying to fix the R, being responsible for things outside my control. In some ways I had to get to the point of what I read on a bumper sticker: "Wife for sale, take over payments"
So Lil, you know some one I could trade her/hook her up with, where she would be happy? Just an academic question, not much reality.
I am not saying that to be mean or derogatory towards BB. Its more like do I want this cr@p to continue? Can it be good for me or BB?
Sometimes I think like cac4, I must be an @sshole in BB's mind so why does she stay? I know I am not but I know we are different.
It's one of those situation where I an not happy but still don't want to neglect BB or the R. I still have my "head of the household/responsibility hat" on, my general's mind set that the troops need food, a place to sleep, and medical care.
As a kid I didn't take anymore from life than I had to. My father and step father died before I was 17. I gave back to those that helped me when I was growing up when I went to work, supported my mother and myself with part-time jobs before I could work in a business. I did yard work and drove around one of those women that you described to Jenny, that wore a Shaw.
About BB no budging, well I don't know about no budging. Wouldn’t say that. Its more like lots of noise and cranky sometimes.
It's working with independent, do what she wants to do behaviors. It's my guilt about wanting to do things I want to do when she thinks/tells me it isn't something she likes, makes her really upset. Its that sad, lost soul face she displays when she is about to lose a best friend.
Can you use this approach in other areas? Back to reality. Yes I can use this approach other places. I see caring too much screws some things and not caring as much is helpful.
