I guess that makes sense. Like you Nicola, I do have some anger towards my STBCAXW. But it is regards to the impact this is having on the kids - which she dismisses, but is VERY VERY REAL!
D11 yesterday afternoon told my Mom - "Grandma do you know that Cousin1 and Cousin 2 are going to be my step sister and step brother now?" My mom asked her how that made her feel and she said "It creeps me out a little bit." My mom asked "Did you talk to your mom about this?" D11 said "Yes". My mom asked, "What did she say?" D11 says "She said I am creeped out by it just because it is new to me." Whatever Jill - you Psycho!!!! See it makes me angry just typing it. My children shouldn't have to deal with this situation. Just makes me want to be a stronger parent, but it does make me angry at her.
So sometimes I want to get back at her, but you are right - I also want peace. In the end, Jill is not worth it....and certainly stress is my life is not worth it over her.
