Well, I ended up calling H this morning a little before 9. It went to his voicemail, so I just left a message letting him know that I was returning his call and e-mail from yesterday and that I had some things to go over with him, too, and to call me back so that we could schedule a time to talk. And then I just said something like "I hope you're having a nice day." That was it. Hopefully that was okay...
He hasn't called me back yet... I'm at the job site waiting for an appointment. I HAVE to drive right by the other job site to get to this job site, and his car is at the other job site. I have to go over to that site to finish up this appointment, but I promise not to seek him out. If he finds me while I'm there, great. If not, I'll just leave (this is sooooo hard...).
Quote:
he might be trying to flush you out of the bushes too
What does this mean, Lin?
Thanks for the advice about the wine, Lin. I actually don't like wine and don't drink that much. I'll be sure to be careful when/if I do drink. Thanks for taking such good care of me!
I need help on something... I really want to know if H told his brother and the other guys on the job site what is going on with us when he just disappeared. I feel awkward around them and really want to know. Is it okay to ask H if he told his brother or anyone else on the job site what is going on? (I promise I won't get into any other discussion...) I just feel sick to my stomach in thinking that he might have started to tell people. I don't know what other excuse he might have given for disappearing - without me. The guys didn't say anything to me when I was there, but I just feel weird. H told me that I could tell whoever I wanted but that he would ask me to let him know so that he is aware, so it's only fair that it go the other way, too, right?
Am hanging in there today, but feeling sick to my stomach. Am working hard to push the negative thoughts out of my mind and replace them with positives. I just keep thinking that I want my life back... I want to ENJOY my work so badly; I want to enjoy being around H and have him be his old self around me; I want to see the projects that he's looking at; etc. I know the only way I can hope to get those things is if I let go for now, and that just hurts so much.... I miss him.
