In 1986, Mkele Mbembe was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from > > Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a > > young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. > > > > The elephant seemed distressed, so Mbembe approached it very >carefully. > > He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot, and found > > a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as > > gently as he could, Mbembe worked the wood out with his hunting > > knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. > > > > The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on > > > its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Mbembe stood > > frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. > > Eventually the elephant trumpeted loud ly, turned, and walked away. > > > > Mbembe never forgot that elephant or the events of that day. > > > > Twenty years later, Mbembe was walking through the Brookfield Zoo with > > > his teenage son, Tapu. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one > > of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mbembe and his > > son were standing. > > > > The large bull elephant stared at Mbembe, lifted its front foot off > > the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times, > > then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man. > > > > Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mbembe couldn't help wondering if > > this was the same elephant. Mbembe summoned up his courage, climbed > > over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right > > up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. > > > The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mbembe's > > > legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly. > > > > Probably wasn't the same elephant. >
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
I fear H will be happier w/o me and will never regret the loss.
I fear OW really is prettier/better than me.
I fear my kids will hate H forever.
I fear I will never have any self-esteem again.
I fear H will never take my face in his hands, look in my eyes and say "do you know how much ILY" again.
I fear being truly alone the rest of my life.
I fear I really am not interesting/lovable/pretty/smart/capable.
I fear being destitute like so many LBS whose H abandon them after they've not worked and raised the kids for years and therefore are so far behind career-wise that they are never able to catch up.
I fear I will never trust anyone ever again.
I fear the day I have to sit alone at my kids weddings or go to the hospital at the birth of my grandchildren and H is there with his new love.
Last edited by Sunflower23; 04/05/0702:42 PM.
"Tell me what you plan to do with your one wild and precious life." Mary Oliver