Don't be so certain of what your husband "thinks". In my experience, husbands do not think. They rationalize their selfish behavior. All we can do is detach and watch and wait without getting sick ourselves.
Cope with the anxiety and present lonliness by being kind to yourself. Make yourself a project. Reclaim your good health and reconnect with friends that are special and non-judgemental. I know I sound like a hippy practioner of some sort, but getting physically stronger creates mental wellness and the ability to cope with unforseen situations.
Good books help. I own a 'tower of self help' but I am not necessarily talking about them... Just great reading that reminds us of the larger, better world. My reading habit helped me through an awful childhood and has kept me almost calm, since.
The Tower of Self Help is what I resort to when I lose my way. Or reading here. Realizing there is not much original grief helps me cope. We can survive our husband's disloyalty with grace or not... it is up to us.
