Hey, guys --

As always, thank you for all of the time and care that you take in responding to me and helping to "lift me up."

The Lorazepam seemed to work really well today, but I should have just taken one pill I think (I took two). They made me really sleepy, and I'm having a hard time "snapping out of it." I think I'm going to see if I can just take a short nap for an hour, hour and a half and then get back up.

BTW, I HAVE NOT GONE TO THE OFFICE AT ALL TODAY!!! \:\) I was so freaked out this morning when I went to the doctor that I just threw on some sweats, hair in a pony tail, etc. Don't really feel like showering and getting pretty today - and it's been a long time since I've allowed myself to do that.

Haven't heard from H yet either today by phone or e-mail. I forwarded a phone message to him but did not "announce" it or anything. That was it!

If I'm able to take this nap, then I need to go up to the office and see if I can concentrate on work for at least several hours. I'll consider my "sweats day" my treat for myself today rather than going shopping since I spent so much of this day "coping."

Hope H isn't at the office and sees me all untidy like this - I don't want him to think I'm upset or out of sorts in any way...

Therapist appointment was okay today, but not great. I don't feel like she's really helping me by giving me tools to work on my issues, i.e., controlling, obsessive, perfectionist, etc. She said I need to change my frame of mind and that events will happen on their own that will help me to secure the right results??? something like that...

Anyway, will someone please write a bullet point list of things I need to be doing and not doing around H and also what I need to be doing for myself. I got the list of relaxing things, which is great. Any other ideas???