Divorcebusting.com  |  Contact      
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 1 of 4 1 2 3 4
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
N
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
Thread locked up so I am starting a new one here for the time being.

I have not spoken to STBXH for 2 days now. I don't forsee him contacting me except to see the kids. In this instance, I am going to tell him not to come around for a while. I just can't deal with him being around right now. I am not keeping him from seeing the kids. Because in the end, if he truly wanted to be with them, he would do whatever it took to come see them. He would at least call and ask me when he could see them.

I am just frustrated right now. My funk is starting to improve but it is still tough to get through each day. It will get better.

Not Giving Up Take III thread


"Be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal. Keep in mind that you are both imperfect people. Look to God as the source of all you want to see in your marriage and don't worry how it will happen...Leave it in His hands."
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 9,916
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 9,916
(((((((((((NGU)))))))))))))

I have my black clothes......renting a truck soon ;\)


....Understand, that I can't, not be what I am
I'm not the milk, and Cheerios in your spoon
~ Avril Lavigne ~
..."Nobody's Fool"...

me=ok /D'd since 7/07
D=ok
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
N
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
you are too funny!


"Be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal. Keep in mind that you are both imperfect people. Look to God as the source of all you want to see in your marriage and don't worry how it will happen...Leave it in His hands."
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
N
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
My mood is improving and with each day that I don't have to deal with him, it gets better. Even when I do deal with him, it reinforces my decision. He is absolutely stuck in this fantasy world. I am going to continue moving on and doing what I need to do for me and the kids.

I have realized that I can't be with someone when the only person giving is me. Even last night, he came over to see the kids for a whole hour.....WOW!!!!! And then had to rush out to meet up with a friend to see the basketball game. He can't talk about our future because you see, basketball is so much more important...again, reinforces my decision!


"Be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal. Keep in mind that you are both imperfect people. Look to God as the source of all you want to see in your marriage and don't worry how it will happen...Leave it in His hands."
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 9,916
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 9,916
;\)


....Understand, that I can't, not be what I am
I'm not the milk, and Cheerios in your spoon
~ Avril Lavigne ~
..."Nobody's Fool"...

me=ok /D'd since 7/07
D=ok
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,242
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,242
"My mood is improving and with each day that I don't have to deal with him, it gets better."

I have noticed this too...the distance makes everything appear so much more clearly. Keep it up Jen. You are awesome.


Me-36
H-36
3 young children
Married-14y
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
N
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
Thanks Aud...I just read up on your sitch. Stick to your guns! No matter what you think, you are doing the right thing. If he doesn't want to go to counseling, then you do what you have to do. You can not compromise your principles for this man. You are too strong and have come so far.


"Be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal. Keep in mind that you are both imperfect people. Look to God as the source of all you want to see in your marriage and don't worry how it will happen...Leave it in His hands."
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
N
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
Well, I haven't heard much from STBXH in the past few days. I sent him a tm yesterday asking if he could please return the electric drill so that I could do some work around the house. I simply said "Can you return the drill or should I go out and buy a new one?" His response "Yes, I will bring it back and I am sorry for yesterday. I didn't mean to upset you and make you mad." This was brought about because Monday night he couldn't take a few minutes and discuss our future. He just HAD to get to a friends house to watch the Ohio State basketball game. Made me angry but the old me would have called him right up after he left that night and chewed him out. The new me just went inside, cried a few tears but then threw it away....I let that emotion go just as quickly as it came on me.

But anyways...haven't heard one word from him today and probably won't hear from him until he realizes that maybe he should come see his kids. I really think all of this has to do with a freedom factor. He wants to do what he wants, when he wants. Which means, if he is at home, he can't do that. There are 3 kids that rely on someone to be there for them. He is definitely not that person. And he doesn't seem to want to be that person. That is why I am going to move ahead with a D. I just need to get ahold of a lawyer and get the ball rolling.

This is a hard thing to do but I must do it so that I can move on with my life and start new.


"Be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal. Keep in mind that you are both imperfect people. Look to God as the source of all you want to see in your marriage and don't worry how it will happen...Leave it in His hands."
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
N
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 524
just a little update....

Still have not talked to STBXH in person. Everything has continued through tm and he has yet to come over and see the kids since Monday night.

I basically told him yesterday through tm that my conversations with him will be based on money for the kids from now on. He asked me why I was being nasty and I just said that I don't mean to be nasty but this is how it has to be from now on since he is choosing this life.

So really nothing new. No new sign of life from H...just same old selfish man.


"Be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal. Keep in mind that you are both imperfect people. Look to God as the source of all you want to see in your marriage and don't worry how it will happen...Leave it in His hands."
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,697
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,697
Hey girl...

((HUGS)) I know this is difficult. I am glad to see that your mood is improving. Just be careful. The rollercoaster isn't over yet, but you'll get there...

By the way, I got your comment about Noah. He's cute, isn't he? ;\)

Email me if you wanna chat!!
Love,
Kristy


M: 29
H: 27
Married: 6/22/02
Bomb: 6/12/06
H moved out: 6/16/06
Signed D papers: 1/8/07
D final: 5/14/07




Page 1 of 4 1 2 3 4

Moderated by  Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Michele Weiner-Davis Training Corp. 1996-2025. All rights reserved.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5