Cindy - I am very happy for you too - you have given me hope
Quote: even hugging me close to his side as we walk.
When C and I would do this she would lean over and nibble on my ear or get some neck sugar. That never did fail to just stop me in my tracks. AND, it is something I miss very much. But she is getting closer to doing things like that again so it continues to be one of my goals.
you keep up the good work in keeping love alive and continue to be a good example to the rest of us.
You are really on a wonderful roll and helping many of us here in BB land. I, too am now moving in a very positive direction with my H....I'm a few months behind you, but following your progress. Will stay tuned! You are DBing to the max and it has worked out so well.
Isn't it about time to send your success story to Michele??
Just got back from a wonderful vacation with my h at his mom's house! Was awesomely busy cause my h had us hopping taking us golfing, to the movies, to visit his dad (who came up from Florida just to see h), to visit his grandparents, to go sightseeing, etc. Hardly slept at all too !
We had 2 small bumps but were dealt with and over. Both were just minor misunderstandings between h and i which having been dealt with right away showed me that my h's jestings towards me are just that and no more! I read into his comments too much. Though I did specify that I would be more willing to laugh if he can not comment about my belly. (not as taunt as I would (but thankfully small ) like thus I'm sensitive). H said ok.
My h is busy doing the small things! Which I find so GREAT!!! He does:
hold my hand as we walk hold my hand as we lie down to sleep hug me as we walk kiss me goodnight hold the door open for me TALK about anything!! BIG BIG surprise me with little gifts do chores without my bidding makes chore schedules for the kids takes the kids to do fun things that i DID NOT schedule
These are just a smidget of what h is up to lately! I remark to everyone that the situation NOW is like night to day to what I was doing this time last year.
I find myself remembering this time last year, marking the milestones in my head..parelleling what is happening right now. This time last year...h and I were headed to our first divorce court appearance, he was seeing ow, telling me it was over, but dating me occassionally, and sleeping with me all the time...one day he was nice the next he was a raving lunatic!
It's definitely DAY with all the lights on in my db'ing land!!!
Cindy, How do you go through the D process, the settlement stuff, etc. without really ticking off your H? Or did it matter? I am concerned about a fair settlement plus maintaining a good R with my H.
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
So, would you say things are better now than ever before?
It's amazing how great a relationship can be when both parties really work at it. After a sham of a marriage, I'm learning how great it can be with my girlfriend. Just something as simple as both people being considerate of the other goes a *long* way.
I'm so happy for you, and I'm so glad things are working out so well. I know you "earned" this - you worked hard at db'ing. Congrats!!!!
I guess fair settlement is determined by your state and whether your h wants that...here in texas it is community property so it's 50/50. Well maybe more like 80/20 in favor of the wife.
I don't think there can be an amicable settlement unless you are more than willing to give up nicely whatever he asks for.
Also it depends on what 'type' of attorney you have...mine kept me from getting petty and fighting over the sofa (nice leather one valued at $1000 that my h took, I didn't have any living room furniture!) in exchange for extra curricular school activity monies.
I guess it depends on how dirty h wants to get or how inept your attorney is...it can go either way.
Sorry to not have anything concrete but these situations are anything but predictable!
!
) like thus I'm sensitive). H said ok.
