I'm just thinking out loud - why would anyone leave a M for a friendship?
My 2 cents ONLY...but I don't think LL's h left the marriage FOR the friendship. I think he S. to alleviate confusion, anger, stress, discomfort, maybe a thousand other things but I don't have the sense that the "friendship" WAS the destination.
But... that's just speculation!
Sage
PS LL -- I'm really liking your thinking!!!!
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
having been through what we've all been through with ows/oms and now trying to piece and rebuild trust how would you feel if your spouse did not have a regular work schedule therefore you don't know what time they will leave for work or arive home and you don't really know what it is they are doing when they go to work as it's their off season (yet they seem to find reason to go in each day) then one evening after they've been home for several hours, eaten dinner, played with kids, put kids to bed etc a book of matches from a resteruant falls out of their pocket.
mind you they didn't call you all day (well with the exeption of when you knocked them off the internet by logging onto the same account from home) when they typically do at least call to let you know they are on their way home.
stopped for something to eat on the way home? huh? not enough food here? not bother to call and say hey I'm stopping here to get something to eat would you like me to bring home anything for you and/or the kids? never mind the fact that I freely take advantage of my freedom and stop wherever whenever I want throughout the day while you are bound to the kids and can't even get to the hospital for a blood test you've been needing for over a month. Don't take it to mean anything that I didn't bother to let you know what I was up to and decided to not tell you anything about my day and ignore the fact that I got all defensive when you asked why I had matches from a resteraunt in my pocket it all means nothing.
LL annoyed?
yup.
LL annoyed at the fact that h stopped to eat at a resteraunt by himself on the way home from work?
not really, more annoyed by the lack of phone calls, the lack of saying hey I stopped at unos on the way home, the lack of respect for my lack of independance and freedom, the lack of understanding how to build trust by not leaving out details of ones day.
LL even more annoyed that she went to bed early last night without reading (as the results of the discussion did not lend to a reading mood) with h saying nothing and comming to bed an hour later to then have h say nothing to her at all in the morning in fact stay silent til it was time to ask "have you seen my hat" and then to kiss me on the forehead and say bye.
humph! LL said as she crossed her arms and pondered.
did h actually call today on his way home from work and utter the words "do you need anything" was h actually listening to her when she spoke last night? is this his way of extending the olive branch as they say? Will h ever just be direct? is it so hard to say "I'm sorry for not considering your feelings last night"
as is typical I dunno...roller coaster life...thing is I really do like roller coasters...wish it were summer I'd plan a run a way day (find a sitter for the kids) to the amusement park.
crazy LL,
it's raining it's pooring nope it's clearing... no wait it's raining.. is that hail? damn it it's snowing... do I see sunshine? drizzle, drizzle, drizzle maybe the sun will shine again tomorrow
I think most of you can understand I'm not talking about the weather but more about life in general.
Quote: Will h ever just be direct? is it so hard to say "I'm sorry for not considering your feelings last night"
you should know the answer to that question...he's a typical man...he has no idea he is supposed to validate you feelings...the good news is that he did listen...and that he did call you...that's what you asked him to do right?
Georgia
"It's not what happens to you, it's what you make of it." Zig Ziglar
We talk about your work how your boss is a jerk We talk about your church and your head when it hurts We talk about the troubles you've been having with your brother About your daddy and your mother and your crazy ex-lover We talk about your friends and the places that you've been We talk about your skin and the dimples on your chin The polish on your toes and the run in your hose And God knows we're gonna talk about your clothes You know talking about you makes me smile But every once in awhile
I wanna talk about me Wanna talk about I Wanna talk about number one Oh my me my What I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see I like talking about you, usually, but occassionally I wanna talk about me I wanna talk about me
We talk about your dreams and we talk about your schemes your high school team and your moisturizer creme We talk about your nanna up in Muncie, Indiana We talk about your grandma down in Alabama We talk about your guys of every shape and size The ones that you despise and the ones you idolize We talk about your heart, about your brains and your smarts And your medical charts and where you start You know talking about you makes me grin But every now and then
I wanna talk about me Wanna talk about I Wanna talk about number one Oh my me my What I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see I like talking about you, usually, but occassionally I wanna talk about me I wanna talk about me
You you you you you you you you youyouyouyouyou I wanna talk about me
I wanna talk about me Wanna talk about I Wanna talk about number one Oh my me my What I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see I like talking about you, usually, but occassionally I wanna talk about me I wanna talk about me
You can't imagine so many monkeys in the daily mail All of them coming anonymously so they leave no trail I never thought I'd have an admirer from overseas But someone is sending me stationary filled with chimpanzees. Some chimps in swimsuits, some chimps are swinging from a vine Some chimps in jackboots, some chimps that wish they could be mine. Starsky and Hutch chimps, a chimp who's sitting on the can A pair of Dutch chimps who send their love from Amsterdam. Another postcard with chimpanzees And every one is addressed to me. If I had to guess, I'd say the monkey-sender thinks it's great He's sending me, maybe she's sending me just to see me get irate I'm losing sleep - and it's gonna be keeping me up all night I thought it was funny, but now I've got money on a monkey fight. Some chimps in hard hats, chimps a-working on a chain gang Some chimps who love cats, burning rubber in a Mustang A birthday-wishing chimp, a chimp in black like a goth A goin' fishin' chimp, a British chimp in the bath. Another postcard with chimpanzees And every one is addressed to me. Somehow they followed me even though I packed and moved my home No matter what, they come and they come they won't leave me alone Another monkey in the mail could make me lose my mind But look at me shuffling through the stack until I finally find Some chimps in swimsuits Some chimps in Jackboots Some chimps in hard hats Some chimps who love cats I've got some shaved chimps; that's chimps devoid of any hair I've got depraved chimps dressed up in women's underwear. Another postcard with chimpanzees And every one is addressed to me. Every one is every one is every one is addressed to me. Every one is every one is every one is addressed to me. Another postcard with chimpanzees And every one is addressed to me. Another postcard with chimpanzees And every one is addressed to me. Another postcard with chimpanzees And every one is addressed to me. Another postcard with chimpanzees And every one is addressed to me.
(intro.)Its like i dont care about nothing man... Roll another blunt... ooohh la da da da la da da la la da da
I was gonna clean my room until I got high I was gonna get up and find the broom but then I got high My room is still messed up and I know why(why man)
Chorus: cause I got high Because I got high Because I got high
I was gonna go to class before I got high I could'a cheated and I could'a passed but I got high(uh uh la la da da) I'm takin it next semester and I know why(why man) (hey hey)
chorus
(go to the next one, go to the next one, go to the next one) I was gonna go to work but then I got high(ohh,ohh) I just got a new promotion but I got high(la da da da da) Now I'm selling dope and I know why(why man)
chorus
I was gonna go to court before I got high I was gonna pay my child support but then I got high(no you wasn't) They took my whole paycheck and I know why(why man)(yeah eh eh)
chorus
I wasn't gonna run from the cops but I was high(uh, i'm serious man) I was gonna pull right over and stop but I was high(uh) Now I'm a paraplegic( ha ha ha) and I know why(why man)
chorus
I was gonna pay my car and note until I got high (say what say what?) I wasn't gonna gamble on the boat but then I got high (uh uh) Now the tow truck is pullin away and I know why (why man)
chorus
I was gonna make love to you but then I got high (ooh) (im serious) I was gonna eat ********* too(ohhh) but then I got high Now i'm jackin' off (ahh) and I know why(trying to shut off ha ha ha)
chorus
I messed up my entire life because I got high (go go go) I lost my kids and wife because I got high say (what say what say what?) Now I'm sleepin on the side walk and I know why (why man) (yeah yeah)
chorus
Ima stop singing this song because I'm high(raise the ceiling... baby) I'm singing this whole thing wrong because I'm high(bring it back) And if I don't sell one copy, I'll know why(why man?) (yeah eh eh)
Cause I'm high Cause I'm high Cause I'm high la la da da da da la da da da shoobe do be do wa skibitty do da da da la get jiggy with it scubbydooby wa
that's just speculation!