Most of the threads seem to be about coaching one spouse on how to win the other one back. Are their trained counselors for either in person visits or phone consultation who are Michelle-Trained who can help us both? We don't believe traditional counseling works, so if it is just "so tell me how things are going" to start the conversation each session and then we list our grievances with each other and feel worse after each session, we've been there. At the same time, we need to take personal responsibility for each of our behaviors. One of us can't be wrong all the time and be the one blamed. Thank you!
H:54 W:46 D:11 D:21 M:12 BD:1/15 In-house Separation 2/15 DB started 7/15, W sees consistency 9/15 Dropping the rope and having her leave 2/16, moves 5/16 Reconciliation 1/17 Obviously still struggling
Hi Flight, this is such a strange thing, but I read your entire threads start to finish, I remember being shocked and happy finding out how things just seemed to work out for you.
Sorry to hear that things haven't all been plain sailing for you, what's been happening since your wife emailed you all those years ago? Were things good for a while? How long did you date for before moving forward?
Me: 41 W:42 T: 14 M: 11 S: 6
"What happened happened, and couldn't have happened any other way...because it didn't"
Yes, there are Solutions Based Therapists (SBT) that can help you and your wife in tandem. The important part is that your W needs to be committed to therapy. If she isn't, I do not recommend couples therapy. Instead, I would recommend therapy for just yourself.
There are also SBT coaches you can sign up for here, for telephone therapy.
Most of the threads seem to be about coaching one spouse on how to win the other one back. Are their trained counselors for either in person visits or phone consultation who are Michelle-Trained who can help us both? We don't believe traditional counseling works, so if it is just "so tell me how things are going" to start the conversation each session and then we list our grievances with each other and feel worse after each session, we've been there. At the same time, we need to take personal responsibility for each of our behaviors. One of us can't be wrong all the time and be the one blamed. Thank you!
How many MCs have you tried?
I ask this because so many people will shop around for the best deal on a car, or a flat-screen TV, but when it comes to MC/IC they just think the first person they find they have to stick with no matter what. You don't. If the current C is not working for you, then find one that will.
Our MC was great. Read the room extremely well. Obviously had a lot of experience with couples where one person had one foot out the door. Had the experience to know that not everything could be handled by the theoretical, by the book methods.
But I am sure MWD's coaches could also help! Give one a try.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
