We haven't submitted a response yet. Will probably wait a while. Going over in the am to have breakfast with my kids. Plan is to avoid W and not talk. I miss my children.
Doing ok. I feel more strength each day. Had breakfast with the kids and it was great, though emotional for all of us. The youngest is very clingy and it was hard to say goodbye. I don't know when I will be back. As for the W, I said hello and made some small talk when I played with the kids. She said goodbye when I left but was silent and just shut the door. I don't even really want to see her right now.
hard to see/ forgive her right now You may want to Pray for help in forgiveness if you can- that will help you as well as help her
good to be there for the kids
This is difficult to go through but it does get easier
Just do what you need to take care of yourself- Be three as much as you can for your kids Continue to do the right things and more will be revealed you will be guided
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Thanks. I have not yet prayed for forgiveness but pray every day she finds peace and can heal. I am doing what I can for the kids and will continue to help. I want then to help me during the moving process but am looking at how they can. I may take then to pick out new furniture.
I think that they should be included in your moving experience. I think it's a nice idea to allow them to come along and help you pick out new furniture. They will feel wanted and loved in doing so...after all, they will be staying w/you some of the time too and it will be their home as well.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I'm off a few days this week. I am taking a friend to pick furniture but will let them pick sheets, blankets and some new games/movies and such.
I have received an outpouring from her entire family about then wanting to visit with me over the Xmas break and even in the future. I appreciate it, don't really know how common it is either though. It is strictly against W's wishes too. They seem not to care. It weighs on my mind and is upsetting in a way. It is likely about to get extremely ugly with the D as well. I don't know how much W is telling then though.
Additionally, I have started having dreams and nightmares just as I did 5 months ago when this all started. My sleep is broken again and days are extremely long. This process is taxing on so many levels.
Packed up today. Movers coming tomorrow. It was hard at first but got better as the day progressed. Found our wedding guest book and pictures. Was a strange feeling. What do people do with this stuff? Keep it for the kids?
This is really hitting home for me. I hate that the kids are going to see moving boxes sitting around. And that the W wili see an empty closet....... I've come a long way, haven't cried in a couple of months. Strange to feel so numb......
Sometimes numb is a protective mechanism and right now maybe numb is exactly what you need. Its a quiet, a rest, before you resume dealing with all of this. I can only imagine at some level this is very difficult, but you MAY feel a little better when its all done and you have finished your move.
Dreams and nightmares are rough but they may also help you process some things that are just too hard when you are awake and alert. But not getting sleep is making it harder, I am sure. Do the best you can, maybe try exercise a few hours before sleep, or whatever may help you get better rest. It is obvious and simple but sleep can help or hurt our mood and energy so much, specially when we are dealing with difficult times.
If it works for you try framing moving to a new place as a start. Yes it is very hard, and its not ideal. But its also a haven, a place to rest and heal. Try to make it your own somehow, some place you can retreat to. For me even simple things like getting basic supplies for the new place (or furniture) was a symbol of taking care of myself at a tough time in my life.
And I suggest keep anything you are not sure of (like guest book and picture) in a box, put away and don't deal with it now. You can decide later.
