I don't know how to attach my original post. So note to admin - my original post is titled "Hi I'm new here need advice."
I haven't been on for a bit. We've been basically doing the same things. We got into a fight over money yesterday. He doesn't understand how overwhelmed that I am and gets very defensive and a fight ensues. I called his sister breaking down. She talked to me for a while. She said she thought I should try to talk to him again. I didn't think it was a good idea so I tried today. Didn't go well. I basically do t understand if he wants to try to come home, then why isn't he trying? I just got off the phone telling him that I can't do this anymore that I'm going to move on. It's too much of an emotional roller coaster. He didn't seem to like the convo and just wanted to hang up. I told him we can't leave the convo and just hang up. He refused to answer so I said alright you just aren't inthis so I'm just gonna move on.
I really want it to work out but I I just don't u derstand it. At all.
Well you are asking him to go a long way - mentally, emotionally - in a short period of time. If not pursuing gets you results, stick with it. When he comes back, you need to be ready with something different. You also need patience, it may not happen as quickly as you'd like it to.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
Thank you for responding. I need to regroup, clearly. I'm going to back off and get myself back together. I suppose if he was ready to come back a few weeks ago he can get there again. I suppose I am being impatient and wanting him back now.
Rough day. Feeling like I have messed up again by the phone call yesterday. Hoping that starting fresh will really work this time. Seeing my impatience on how I have handled a lot of things makes me wonder if he is gone forever. 😔
So today starting out rough I decided to pull out the DB book again. I reread the Last resort technique. I also read the part after. I should have read it sooner. It's exactly what has happened. Basically saying when it is working, do not come on to strong or the WAS can back peddle. I'm going to keep reading. It really seems to help me. For whatever reason when I read the book I feel motivated and not so hopeless.
I'm having such a rough day. His mom texted me. Saying he had told her that he had stopped by. I told her yea to drop off money for some bills. She said that he had told her he was going to help me as long as I need to get back on my feet. I'm about to have a nervous breakdown. She seems to think this is good, which it is but I'm upset bc it's like he's already saying that he isn't coming back. I'm literally about to cry my head off at work.
