Met my new IC today. I like her. However, the only reason I was referred to her was because WS wanted us to continue seeing MC therefore I couldn't see her as an IC. WS did not show up for MC today even though it was him that asked to schedule it. Didn't call. Nothing. I texted him(shouldn't have) and he replied that he had just finished supper. DBing or not, I told him I thought he was a d!ck.
Guess we are done with MC which is disappointing because even though it's not really helpful right now, it was the only hope for getting my conflict avoiding WS to deal with some of his stuff.
This is a perfect opportunity to really set some boundaries. Including him not being in your home anymore. And no more texting back and forth.
34, xw33 M-10, T-18 2D (8 and 5) Ilybinilwy-1/16 EA/PA- 7/15-present (with my former best friend) Trial apartment-2/16 (also when she considers us separated) W moved out-8/16 W Filed 11/21/16 D final 1/30/17
No more texting. He showed up hours late for one visit this week and didn't show up for one at all. He was also to call his insurance company to set up my IC for coverage(he has to call. I can't. ) and he didn't so I had to pay for my IC and the MC.
Use that anger and channel into something. Get busy getting a life.
Me31 W31 M11yrs S6yrs 23Mar16-BD 9Apr16-W admitted EA w boss. 27Jun16-W Changed job and promised NC w OM. 14Jul16-Continued contact w OM.Start of Separation. 24May17-Divorced.
Still feeling angry when I woke up and wanting to tell him so. I just keep trying to remember that it will make zero difference to tell him how I feel. I am trying to focus on GAL and just self care but how do you accept the wrongness of it all? He believes he cheated because there was something wrong with our marriage and he says so Ina regular basis. It irks me. I want him to somehow see the light and get it. How do I cope with the fact that he is likely never going to?
Betrayed spouses cope by giving it time, GAL'ing, and learning how to truly forgive.
I have learned so much on forgiveness in the last year.
Your anger at him right now is like trying to teach a fish to ride a bicycle. It's not gonna work.
If you can't control him, his action, and those actions will continually hurt you, stop asking for changes in him, and start asking for changes in yourself. The building is on fire - time to find the exit, and make sure you can live to get help for the others in the fire (your husband).
M46, EXWW46 M15 T17 D20, S19, D13 M - Addiction since 1998 W EA/PA #1 2013/2014 W EA #2 June 2015... BD 1 Big D talk 9/15 BD 2 - EA/PA disc 10/30/15 Served D 1/22/16 Divorced 5/25/16 (yes, that fast!)
In addition to what trumpet said, you can also keep a permanent marker handy at all times. If he falls asleep sometime when you're around, then you use the opportunity to add some facial highlights with the permanent marker. Things like a curly mustache and large circles under his eyes.
I know, I know. I have to stop letting him get to me. I really need to go dark. A series of ignorant texts today about finances that I wish I hadn't responded to. This crap hurts.
WS has sent many a text today complaining about what he has to pay after I asked him to pay for the MC session he stood me up for. I think I am going to file. He doesn't agree that he shouldn't be in my house and I worry that he will stop paying the little he is paying. What do guys think?
