I would tell her that it is disrespectful to not let me know when and what you are doing. I need to be able to contact you if something happens with the kids, etc. Also, I don't want to sit and worry about you (I'm a horrible chronic worrier and always assume someone has been murdered or in a car accident).
Its just funny because I feel like everything I would say before I got to this forum and read most of DB would completely screw me over and make the situation worse.
My plan:
Talk about separation agreement, talking about moving day...mention boxes if needed. I am sure at some point she will try to talk about why she is doing this and how hurt she is etc. I will just tell her that I understand why she is doing what she is doing, tell her I support her, and if she is happier this way then that is what matters.
As a side note, I would seriously consider changing your member name here. Don't reflect how you are now, let it be a reflection of how you are going to be. Make that a goal. Sometimes that little change can start empowering you.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
I hear you. It's so hard. For the last 6 months, my husband has been saying on & off that he is going to move out. We started reading Divorce Remedy Jan 2015. He stopped trying, we both stopped reading. Now August 2016, we are back in the same place, maybe worse. I'm sad and lonely but I know I have to take care of me and focus on me. It's just hard. My heart is heavy but I can't make him do/want anything including me.
Talk about separation agreement, talking about moving day...mention boxes if needed. I am sure at some point she will try to talk about why she is doing this and how hurt she is etc. I will just tell her that I understand why she is doing what she is doing, tell her I support her, and if she is happier this way then that is what matters.
How about...
That you are trying to understand what she is going through...
Because, in reality, you really don't understand...
It's like if I told you that there was a shidtload of water in the ocean, you would agree, yet neither of us knows exactly how much water is in the ocean....
The depths of her are still unknown to her, how could you possibly know....
???
On boundaries....
I want you to also understand that boundaries are good for you. Setting them lets another person know what you are willing to tolerate, and what you aren't willing to tolerate.
However...
Pick your battles wisely. Just because you can, doesn't always mean that you should...
Give yourself time, understand the need, or lack of...
And ask yourself if that is really the hill that you are willing to die on....
