For what it's worth, a couple things that helped me stay detached from W's mood swings:
1) Get a mental image of yourself doing something awesome from one of your GAL activities, sans spouse. Preferably something new that you have never done with spouse. Use that mental image if you find yourself picturing anything negative.
I used to do the generic "picture a happy place" thing or envision a sea of unending blue waves, etc but that never really did much for me and the bad picture would come back. Picturing something concrete that reinforced I could have good times without spouse was a lot more effective for me at shutting down the negative imagination.
2) If you find yourself dreading the spouse leaving, or obsessing over how life might suck if WW doesn't come back fully, quickly remind yourself "it's her loss".
You're awesome, and getting better/stronger by the week while they're still stuck in a fantasy land ignoring their very real issues. The more you GAL and the more you detach from the rollercoaster, the easier it will get to really internalize that.
Last edited by Cadet; 08/29/1602:18 PM. Reason: Start a new thread message
Me, WW - Upper 30s BD - Apr 1 2016 EA - Apr 7 2016 (discovered; ongoing for months; did not confront right away) Confronted wife about EA - May 17 Wife sent NC email to OM - July 11
