As I understand it you are separated but not D yet? Sounds like you need to discuss the situation with a lawyer ASAP to figure out your rights while everyone is still around!
Me, WW - Upper 30s BD - Apr 1 2016 EA - Apr 7 2016 (discovered; ongoing for months; did not confront right away) Confronted wife about EA - May 17 Wife sent NC email to OM - July 11
Hi Kyle, me and XH are in the UK. He needed written permission from his XW1 to take his S out of the country. This was part of their D agreement (they are both originally from the US, so it was a real concern in their case.) I agree that, if this is a concern you need to see a L asap and understand options.
Most L's offer free half hour consults which can be really useful if you prepare ahead and use the time well. I think it's worth seeing 2/3 L's before you decide to instruct anyone.
Hope this helps and hope your concerns prove unfounded...
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
I'm hoping this is all part of some crisis she's having and won't actually follow through with it. I don't want to challenge her on it yet because it would probably get her back up but it's worth arming myself with enough information in the mean time.
What sandi said... you might be correct in 'hoping this is part of some crisis', but even if it is part of the crisis, it could still happen.
As other advised on here, I would find yourself the best dang L you can find dealing with child custody. I'm not 100%, but I don't think one spouse can just up and leave, and take the kids in the process without some formal agreement between the two.
I'm not a lawyer though, so I'd hightail it down there ASAP.
It turns out that she is planning on moving to the other side of the planet with my kids. I have no idea what to do with this information.
Kyle- do you have a lawyer? I would advise no matter how you think she is thinking whether just a phase or not, you do find out your rights.
Depends on the state but I can tell you that you can't pick up the kids if married and just head off into the sunset. That is called kidnapping!!! I know becuz I received some of the same type of threats of moving out of state which my L said she would end up in jail.
Sorry you are in this situation. I hope you can find your way!
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
It isn't your imagination if you hear an echo right now.
Yes, you need to consult an attorney regarding your parental and custodial rights. Be forewarned, your lawyer isn't going to help you reconcile with your wife and that is ok right now.
It sounds like the DB strategies are sinking in a bit.
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Cristy Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004
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I'm hoping this is all part of some crisis she's having and won't actually follow through with it. I don't want to challenge her on it yet because it would probably get her back up but it's worth arming myself with enough information in the mean time.
My thoughts are as everyone is sharing. Protect yourself. This is where you must remove the emotions and focus on the facts. Do not make decisions based on not wanting to upset her, or fear that she won't reconcile. Trust me, I have a couple of friends that made those mistakes and are paying for it 15 years later. Do what is right for you and your children. And do not wait. Many have posted that waiting around and dragging their feet hurt in the long run. I know it is uncomfortable, and feels icky. But you owe it to the family to do it right.
Me 46 Former W 46 D19 D7 BD Feb 2016 WAW moves out 4/16/16 D final 6/1/2017
It's time for me to start changin' the way I look at the world......and at myself. ~James Howlett aka Wolverine
