Hurricane Rising

[Free]

^My feelings exactly.
Stay strong Nate.

[NateG79]

Thanks for stopping by Free. I just believe people have limits. Mine was reached at the suspected new relationship she rebounded to from her A ending. And I'm just not going to put up with it. I don't know how she feels about the whole thing. Haven't asked her, but I know how she wanted it to end. And that's what I gave her. I'm sad about it. I didn't want it. But I didn't see another way. She seemed bound and determined to find someone else to fill that void. And it wasn't with our family. So I feel I know where she stands.

[NateG79]

So went back to visit my lawyer today. Looked over things that are in the system so far. Still no mention of the filing from WW. We went together to tumbling last night. A couple little chit chats about her playing around on the swing, and just generally paying most attention to daughter. She seemed to be upbeat and happy go lucky. Being served seems not to bother her at all, which just reinforces my feelings that this is what she wanted all along, just wouldn't go forward with it. Lawyer asked if I felt she might bring strange men around my daughter at her home and I replied that I couldn't answer that question as I don't know what she does at home. He stated he could file an injunction, but I didn't know if that was the right answer so I just asked to hold off.

He believed the terms I had set forth were pretty fair. 50/50 custody. Although I think it just enables her to be more of a mingling single than she deserves. I'm almost floored to think she may be more enamored with her dating life than spending time with her daughter. Today I've hit full on depression, maybe a little buyer's remorse with the filing. But I still believe it's a boundary that I must follow through with. I just WILL not be a doormat for her anymore. Communication is pretty much nothing, besides a text about D2 every once in awhile. Feels like this whole thing will just quietly go through, and an unceremonious end to a 10 year friendship/relationship.

[Fogg]

I just believe people have limits. Mine was reached at the suspected new relationship she rebounded to from her A ending.

I'm just going to be honest here, I think you got scared she was starting a new relationship and wanted to shock her into waking up by realizing she can lose you. You reached your limit on something she MIGHT have done? A suspected rebound? Sorry, just not sure I buy it. We need to act from a logical stance and remove emotions from our decisions and I'm not sure that's what you did. If D is what you want then so be it, that is your right. Evetyone had the right to decide how to live their life but you have to accept the consequences of your actions just as she does.

If your done your done, that is fine but I would make sure that's what it is. Ask yourself this question, would someone who's done care how the other is reacting to being served?

[NateG79]

Soooooo, funny story. I've had a cough the last few weeks. Well, today I had a cough so violent, it landed me in the hospital. Apparently, I cracked a rib. Much fun.

[G8r]

That must have been a violent cough. I'm glad you're okay and you have a sense of humor about it.

I've thought about serving my W but it's usually when I'm angry and not thinking straight. In fact, I think my anger and resentment have been the biggest thing pushing her away from me. This is one of the things I'm trying to improve to make myself someone a wife would be foolish to walk away from. I'm not saying that your choice was based on emotion because I don't know, it's just my humble opinion. I hope you have made the right choice for yourself. Be well. I hope things work out the way you would like them to.

[Fogg]

Sorry to hear about the rib, hope it heals soon.

[NateG79]

Well the rib is better. Still have a nagging pain, but it's tenable. My little one developed a stye in her eye, so I'll be taking care of her for the next few days while she's at my house. WW had texted me this morning about it, said she wished she could stay with her tonight. I told her I would be very attentive and caring for her through this. We'll see how this goes. Will be a tough few days. And coaching on Thursday, so yay for that.

[sandi2]

You must be very concerned in how your W's eradict behavior will affect your little girl growing up.

[NateG79]

It is a worry I have sandi. I don't trust that she makes good decisions. Especially with men. She gravitates towards just whoever shows her attention male wise. And that's a gamble. She "falls in love" very quickly. She equates sex to love and how romance is just how love always is. Something I can't compete with, as we are no longer intimate. So yes, it does worry me. I don't feel I can chase her anymore. Just have to accept that at this time, this marriage is over. I have no idea if she'll ever unfog, and try to make this family whOle again.