My WW - Trying To Stay Strong

[Strngr!]

New thread. No link to old same reason as before.

I am sensing a "big talk coming"

On of my W freinds that knows about everything texted me and asked me how i was going. She told me she doesnt agree with what my W is doing told me i am and awsome guy and that w would be making a huge mistake by leaving me for OM. She also is urging me to talk to my W i told her i dont see the point. She also told mw shes urging my W to have a talk we me as well. She said its not fair to me what my W is doing. Not sure how to respond if my W decides she wants to have a serious relationship talk tonight.

[Azzork]

New thread. No link to old same reason as before.

I am sensing a "big talk coming"

On of my W freinds that knows about everything texted me and asked me how i was going. She told me she doesnt agree with what my W is doing told me i am and awsome guy and that w would be making a huge mistake by leaving me for OM. She also is urging me to talk to my W i told her i dont see the point. She also told mw shes urging my W to have a talk we me as well. She said its not fair to me what my W is doing. Not sure how to respond if my W decides she wants to have a serious relationship talk tonight.

Be INCREDIBLY cautious with what youre writing here. This could be getting directly cut and pasted to WW. Hell, WW could be using her friend's phone to talk to you. Even what I highlighted in blue is kind of dangerous to say.

It's OK if WW wants to talk about your relationship. Just dont say much besides validating her feelings.

[Strngr!]

Be INCREDIBLY cautious with what youre writing here. This could be getting directly cut and pasted to WW. Hell, WW could be using her friend's phone to talk to you. Even what I highlighted in blue is kind of dangerous to say.

It's OK if WW wants to talk about your relationship. Just dont say much besides validating her feelings.

I have been cautious with what i said tried to say pretty much the same things ive said to W about us... She has promised the convo stays between us and said W didnt even know she was contacting me. A do beleive her bit i could be wrong so im being very careful!

[Strngr!]

So wifes going to stay at her freinds tonight looks like ill have some alone time to try to read another 10-20% of DR book . Maybe ill pick up the guitar and practice a bit its been a while since i diddle around on the dusty old guitar. Right now im chillin with the little man s1 while W is out shopping. Playing some duplo

[Strngr!]

Another trip to the mall another night getting home more then an hour after it closes another night of me missing out on gym. Starting not to care anymore.

[Flight]

StrongJ, from all my reading and my personal experience, the hardest thing of all, and the most important, is to not care anymore. If you mean that, it means you can detach. You have to have the focus on you and maintaining your self respect and having her respect you. She can't have her cake and eat it too. You have to set boundaries that are healthy for you and then enforce them.

You don't necessarily have to give up on her finding her way back, but that can't be your mission. Your mission is to GAL, do your thing, and from a distance watch her actions. Don't engage her in her nonsense. And if she says something you feel is genuine, you can validate her on that point and then stop before you get sucked into an argument or letting her get her needs met from you. She fired you as her husband, don't keep providing those services for free.

[Strngr!]

Wife showed up late this morning coming home from her freinds place she slept at overnight. She is so disrespectful! I told her I cant keep being late for work everyday and that im going to have to get up early have S1 ready for time i need to leave to get to work on time and told her if shes not home by that time i will have to leave and bring him to daycare and she wont get to see him in the morning. Hows that for a boundary any good or do i still suck. Lol

[Azzork]

I told her I cant keep being late for work everyday and that im going to have to get up early have S1 ready for time i need to leave to get to work on time and told her if shes not home by that time i will have to leave and bring him to daycare and she wont get to see him in the morning.

In my opinion:
- everything in blue is perfect.
- I'd have left off the part in green. Thats not your concern.

I think youre learning though.

[Strngr!]

Thanks Azz I'm Trying .

Never been good at this i suppose but ill keep reading and trying to do better. Practice makes perfect i suppose.

[Strngr!]

Also no talk last night at all looks like she doesn't wany to talk. Looks like sandi's thread about WW is bang on again.

I didn't get much reading done last night either since w got home late from the mall and i still wanted to go to the gym. Then i crashed when i got home was falling asleep while reading.