Confirmed H's affair 4 weeks ago. First he said he didn't know what he wanted, then he was figuring it out. Based on evidence I found I know OW is actively looking to leave her H. My H doesn't have the guts to come right out and ask for a divorce. I told him I was seeing an attorney to understand how to protect myself. I ask if he had anything to say. He said he couldn't say it. I told him I wasn't filing for divorce. That I would not push but I would not break our marriage covenant but things couldn't stay the same. He agreed to move out do a legal separation. i feel like I need that to protect assets as H is financially irresponsible. Working on documents now. seeing lawyer on Thursday. We'll see what actually happens.
Me53 H48 M 13 No children together BDMay '15 PA June '15 H moves out,files 8/15 wants "quick divorce" but does nothing Me sending proposal 12/15, court dates upcoming
You may be on moderation now, post in small frequent replies and stay on this thread until you reach 100 posts (for your thread, you can also post on other peoples threads to give support). Especially on this Newcomers forum, where the posting activity is very active, and your posts can quickly fall to the bottom of the page or even several pages down. Keep journaling and asking questions - people will come! Most important - POST!
Get out and Get a Life (GAL). DETACH.
Believe none of what he or she says and half of what he/she does.
Have NO EXPECTATIONS.
Take care of yourself, breathe, eat, sleep, exercise.
Take the parts of this advice that you need and don't worry if I have repeated something that you have already done.
Here are a few links to threads that will help you immensely:
This process is going to take a lot of patience and commitment from you, and a willingness to do what it takes to try and save your M. There are a lot of great people on here who will listen, and guide you through the process.
The main focus is on YOU right now. Can you share some more about your current situation? Were you having problems prior? Do you have kids?
I am 53, H is 48. 2nd marriage for him. Grown kids. We have had our ups and downs but I never ever thought this would happen. Everyone we know if shocked. In the last 2 years H has lost both parents, had several surgeries due to chronic pain and had prostate cancer surgery. He has been off work a lot. He has a history of depression. I will admit that many times I have been more of a mother than a wife, sometimes out of necessity.
Me53 H48 M 13 No children together BDMay '15 PA June '15 H moves out,files 8/15 wants "quick divorce" but does nothing Me sending proposal 12/15, court dates upcoming
Me53 H48 M 13 No children together BDMay '15 PA June '15 H moves out,files 8/15 wants "quick divorce" but does nothing Me sending proposal 12/15, court dates upcoming
Cadet, Me 53, H 48, 2nd marriage for him. he has two grown kids. H has history of depression and chronic pain issue. Me kind of a control freak, sometimes out of necessity. In the last 3 years H has lost both parents, several surgeries, off work a lot. Things have been stressful off and on but never thought we would end up here. Friends and family are shocked at his behavior. He also has a spending/collecting issue. But underneath it all he is/was a good guy.
Me53 H48 M 13 No children together BDMay '15 PA June '15 H moves out,files 8/15 wants "quick divorce" but does nothing Me sending proposal 12/15, court dates upcoming
So far everyone I'm seeing is in the process, some for a really long time. I'd like to hear some success stories.
Me53 H48 M 13 No children together BDMay '15 PA June '15 H moves out,files 8/15 wants "quick divorce" but does nothing Me sending proposal 12/15, court dates upcoming
