Looks like your thread locked -- they do that when you hit 100 replies.
I started this new one for you . . . like the title?
Here's what I had started to reply to you:
Originally Posted By: KieranR
Yeah.
OK, another test passed -- GOOD JOB. That's two passed (last night's spoken boundaries, and this last NOT jumping at her immediate hoop), and one failed (getting her coffee this morning). Overall, not bad for a first day's work!
Now, go PITCH BLACK DARK as planned for the next 18 hours, and you'll be up to a solid "A-"
btw, GOLDEN opportunity missed here. Watch how the dynamics changed if you had, first of all, waited a few hours to reply AT ALL, and then when you did, had you said this:
me: I am quite busy today. If there's anything you need re:(S4) or the household let me know.
W: It seems as if you have made your decision already.
me: No, I have let you know my boundary, which is only fair. You are a grown woman; I assure you, the decision is entirely yours.
Kieran .... For the love of all that is good .. Listen to Starsky and follow it to a T man
I just read your sitch ... Just a few things for you to think about as you are regaining some of the power in your relationship as its clear she had cake, ate it .. and was giving you the neener neeener the entire time.
So she 'says' she ended the 3 year A .... Remember ... believe none of what they say and only 50% of what they do here. Also ... IF .... and I say IF she ended it there is going to be that drug withdrawl phase .... like it was said before .. you have the heavy hitters here and looks like things are moving FAST in your situation ... hang in there, be strong .. and do not bend one bit ..... no one wants a wet noodle as a spouse.
I am absolutely following his advice. I know the value of expertise! I am going dark. W is spinning - she's tried calling half a dozen times in the last 10 min.
I am absolutely following his advice. I know the value of expertise! I am going dark. W is spinning - she's tried calling half a dozen times in the last 10 min.
Total SCRIPT.
She will most likely swing wildly now, from one form of communication to another (phone calls to texts and back), and also in terms of tone (angry spew to sweet-as-sugar and back again).
Oh, and I got twenty bucks that says you get a "NOW you've blown it! I had decided after last nite that I was GOING to end it, but now since you're being such an A$$ AND NOT TALKING TO ME, YOU CAN FORGET IT!" for good measure.
