Been so long since I've posted! Things are going well here. My book club will be getting started next week, I have another Enlisted Spouses meeting on Tuesday, my younger D started gymnastics, older D is starting ballet/tap on the 18th of June, and we just found out we are on our way to Wright Patterson AFB in Ohio in January! I'm looking forward to it, but will miss Hawaii SO MUCH!! I can't believe that 6 months ago H didn't know if he wanted me with him at his next base, and now he says he never wants to be without me!
Wow, we've come so far since last year. It's been a year since H left for his deployment (the beginning of the end) to Cuba, and a bit more than 6 months since the "bomb". I would love to post my story as an inspiration to others, but have no idea where to post it.
H is truly a wonderful man. He's a great husband, father, friend, and partner. He's my best friend again. When I think back to where we were last year, I just can't believe that we are the same people, but "different". I have my own life now, which is what I needed! I stopped living through him, began doing things on my own, with a friend who lives next door (also an AF spouse), joined clubs, etc. I can't see as many changes in myself as H see, but that's ok. He tells me that I'm not as negative as I used to be, I'm not the woman I was last year b/4 the bomb, and he's "deeply in love" with me. He emails me every day, and calls home just to suprise me, hadn't done that in more than a year!! I trust him a lot more now, but there's still more that I have to overcome. It's a work in progress. I believe in his love for me so much now, I didn't b/4. I was insecure, clingy, etc. All of that helped contribute to the "bomb". His reactions to me made the whole thing a vicious circle. I would get clingy, he'd pull away, making me cling tighter, you know the story.
He had his EA (I believe him when he says that's all it was, I didn't a few months ago, quite a change in my thinking) while deployed. But, the EA wasn't the cause of our problems, it was something that happened because our R was damaged. I'm so glad we were able to repair it and make a new relationship. He expresses his happiness to me in many ways.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that there is hope, I had hope, and we overcame a lot! We are a happy, loving family again.
Also, we have decided that when H retired in June 2005, we will be moving back to his hometown of Lafayette, NY. It's just north of Syracuse. Anyone know that area? We will be buying the home he grew up in!! His father has kept it all of these years and is building a new home nearby. We'd get 9 acres of land, with apple trees, etc. The home was originally built in 1791. It has the original beams in it (absolutely gorgeous!!). But, lots of work was done to it. The inside was renovated years ago, but they left lots of orignal woodwork, I can't describe the beauty!! The outside looks modern and his father built an addition when my H was a child. It's over 3000 sq. ft. Very big, but it will be nice. The original barn in still there, as well as the platform where the horses were shoed (way back in the day, lol). My mother in law (H's step-mother) and his father will be living on the lower part of the land (his father owns a total of 65 acres), so they will be very close. I just love them so much and it will be a joy to live near them, and have the kids grow up knowing them. MIL is young(47) FIL is 62.
All of H's family, including bio-mom, and step-father, cousins, etc. live up there, so it will be so nice. The only thing I'm concerned about is that H and I like our privacy, and I hope that won't change too much. H will someday inherit all of the land, and everything will someday go to our girls.
When H asked me about doing this, I was so stunned, crying, etc. H probably thought I was sad or something, but I was SO happy that we are at this point again!
The only bad thing about living up there is the cold! Anyone from there???
I hope everyone is doing well, and I'm so sorry that I haven't posted in so long, I've just been so busy!
Oh, Teach, this is perfect timing. I've been busy with work, overwhelmed, a bit down, way behind on threads but took a few hours tonight to check in.
I was just about to sign off, weary and a little sad for the sitch's of some of my dear friends here, when I thought I'd cruise "Piecing" one last time.
Jill -- Your news is so wonderful! It's amazing to me how well things have turned out for you! You say you don't know where to post your success story...have you considered emailing Michele? I think the whole DB world needs to hear about how your hard work has paid off.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
