I'm finding that I do get a reaction from H when I do the last resort. He gets very insecure. However, he tests me in the worst way possible. Whenever he sees I am pulling away, he starts talking about divorce, bringing up the papers or talking about moving out. Then I fall apart and he says, "oh, I thought you didn't care anymore."
It ends up being a sick game where I never get what I want: sympathy, affection, and him to stop talking about leaving.
If he gets insecure it would seem he still has feelings for you and knows you do for him as well because you cave in. If I was him being a man myself, I would never really know how much I cared unless I really knew I might lose you. That's the situation I'm in right now with my W. I never really knew how much I loved her until she kicked me out. That gave me the chance to really look deep within myself and know how much she really means to me. Seems like he needs to know that you are for real so he can have the chance to think what life would really be like without you in it. I'm no expert on this just giving my input on what I have learned so far and used to my advantage with results in a short amount of time. My wife did not respond until I stopped initiating contact and work on my 180's when around her in person.
separated since 9/01/13 M-31 W-36 D-4 Move back home 12/26/13 3 months of tough times Finally in a happy M
