Hi CC. I am so sorry you lost all of those memories. There is hope that the tech can get the data back. The DoD have some programs to delete data where it overwrites the space 7 times, anything short of that is recoverable. I just pray it is not too expensive for you
I am very proud of how you handled it! So many people here give their walk-away's too much out of fear. I was a poster child in this dep't. You were amazing by giving him the boot.
People are scared that if they stand up for themselves, they will push the other away. I think it is the exact opposite. You showed him how strong you are, and if I can feel awe looking at you, when I barely know anything, I know he has to feel a little of the awe. Well Done!
I am so sorry CC. Our situations seem so similar. Every time I look at H and see emptiness in his eyes and no signs of regret or guilt despite his horrible actions, it takes my breath away. Praying that you can recover the pictures of your children.
I hope you get everything back! If you do, make sure to back it all up. Even if your H didn't wipe it, it was only a matter of time before your laptop cratered. It's not a question of "if" but "when". I have a hard drive hooked up to my router and duplicate everything between my laptop and the hard drive. These days a lot of people back up to the cloud, that's a good way of having a copy of everything "off site".
So today was my big concert. I went, sang mediocre and got by. I did enjoy it more than expected. My H took the kids to watch and thanked me for letting him come with us. He then followed us home (he called it home) to collect a few things but stayed for 2 hours chatting about work. It then led to a conversation about his depression. I tried not to tell him what to do but I did say I think IC would benefit him like it has me.
He got upset in parts (i offered a hug but he didnt take it), telling me he didn't know who he was, whether he was a good person, whether he was a good father. I told him his kids love him and that he's being a great father. He then said he thinks he's made the right decision for our future.
I hate hearing him say that he's made the right decision because it sounds so final but it def hurts less than it used to.
He asked how I was and I said I'm in IC and working on myself and moving on with my life. He wanted to go and get me some food (I've lost 22lbs in 7weeks) but he didn't mention the weight loss.
He did talk about getting away from all the people telling him what they think he wants to hear. I suspect his two divorced business partners with mid twenty girlfriends may not be encouraging him to return to his wife!
I guess I just keep looking after me and being a friend to him. Only time will tell.
M32 H37 DD1 6 DD2 5 M6 T10 EA 31.08.13 Separated and H moved out 19.09.13 ILYBINILWY 23.09.13 OW 11.13
What's everyone's opinions on wedding rings? I took mine off the day I found out about the affair. I then put it back on within days. I'm in two minds about if I should take it off. It feels weird not having them on.
How long did everyone wait to remove it?
M32 H37 DD1 6 DD2 5 M6 T10 EA 31.08.13 Separated and H moved out 19.09.13 ILYBINILWY 23.09.13 OW 11.13
I've gone back and forth with my ring....take it off, put it back on...I decided I will wear it until the last paper signed.
My h doesn't talk to anyone( not to any of his friends-they have tried to reach out to him) he talks to ow though. I told h I am sure she gives great advice! -twice divorced.
M48 H50 M21 T26 S20 at college),S17,D15-cp, dev. delay- cogniv 5yrs old PA confirmed 7/2012 H separates 9/2012 H move home 2/13& 7/13 lasted 2weeks.ILYNILWY OW still in picture. h filed 10/13