Hi everyone, first post, I'll keep it short and sweet. Looking for some insight/motivation/thoughts.
Married 9 years, together 11, no kids. I've always been insecure/fearful of rejection and never being good enough, so it comes out in anger, pushing H away. That's been going on for years. In the past I promised I would change, never have. Started going to counseling in August when things went downhill, got better, then fear came back starting in Jan, then last week he moved out. New counselor, new outlook on long term positive changes, things are going great.
H left to go live at his parents last Thursday 3/21. First five days I begged, pleaded, cried, etc. Barely a response from H. Did a 180 on day 6, no contact, I went dark. This started Wed. Thrusday he texted me "hope your counseling appt goes well." I reply, "Thanks for thinking of me." No contact. Went to bed last night at 10:30, I was asleep when he texted at 11:00 with "Are you up?" I responded when I got up this morning with "Yes." That was it. Calls five hours later, I was very matter of fact and said I am working on myself and am trying to move forward. He then shows up at my house after I texted him after we hung up with, "I'm not going back to work for a bit if you want to talk." He comes over. He's confused, doesn't want a divorce, but "can't touch the burner again with fear of getting burned." I don't blame him. He was emotional, no crying though, he looked so confused and depressed.
What's my next move? Sorry so long, thanks for your advise in advance. Pardon my typos!
Me 29 H 28 M 9 T 11 No kids 2 dogs H moved in with parents 3/21/13 H wants a D 4/2/13 D Filed 4/5/13 Served 4/17/13
GAL start doing things to make you happy. Let him go while he finds himself.
Me:34 W:26 Together:5yrs M:6/4/11 1st bomb 11/11 2nd bomb 1/21/13 W files for D 3/18/13 She's living with her mom S:13 Previous marriage S:11 Previous marriage She has OM Previous FWB
H came over after I texted him that I am tired of being in limbo, says he is comfused, not sure about divorce or working on our marriage. Says it tears him up, he thinks about me all the time, and has a hard time concentrating at work. Says past behavior is a good indicator of future behavior. I said we'll let's stay separated and let's go out on dates and rebuild our friendship and trust, he said well I guess I'm not there yet. Advice besides GAL and continue my counseling? Go dark? I told him if he is leaning towards the D to just do it. He couldn't answer that either. Is this a genuinely confused H? Thanks again in advance.
Me 29 H 28 M 9 T 11 No kids 2 dogs H moved in with parents 3/21/13 H wants a D 4/2/13 D Filed 4/5/13 Served 4/17/13
