Lost the battle. Won the war. D in 06. Cried every day for 18 months. Really long, hard struggle. What I finally learned is that this divorce you are facing is more about him than it is about you. DB helped me cope. Did it bust my D? Not at all. Six years later - finally . . . I am whole again. There really IS life after divorce . . . and I'm thrilled to say . . . a great one!
And by the way . . . I don't really think you can save your marriage . . . as much as we all want to or wanted to. It's about the mental state of the WAS and not you. What DB does . . . is help us all cope with getting on with our lives . . . and I thank all of you SO much. DB kept me semi-sane during the worst of times. Did it save my marriage? No. Did it help me cope? Yes.
Bonkers, Welcome back and yes, I agree w/you. DB is about helping us cope and learn new skills as we rediscover ourselves in the process.
Congratulations on your new life!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks Bonkers for posting. Often times I STILL think I'm crazy...just two nights ago I had a dream about my ex! Shouldn't I be "over" all this by now? Why does it have to take so darn long? I guess that's part of the journey of rediscovering ourselves.
Me 55 H 49 Married 21 years No kids bomb 5/09 filed 7/09 divorced and moving forward 5/10