In our normal like my Wifey does ALL the Xmas shopping and I only buy for her. She knows this -- last night she finished wrapping and asked me if I needed to wrap anything - like I said I only buy for her - and I said no - should I be getting her a present ?? Card --
Very confused how do you all handle this conundrum ???
Merry Xmas BTW
Sunny
If someone decides there is no goodness in you they won't be able to see it. I'll take a BLT over a MLC anyday !!!
Also on a further note she started to show me all the presents she got for our son before she wrapped them when she started I paused the tv to listen to her then she said - I am not sure if I am going to your parents house with you and Mickey on Xmas I haven't made up my mind - I hope your not expecting me to go - ( if you remember she told me she wasn't going to my families house in October )I said I wasn't expecting anything - this seemed to get her mad - she said ok you can turn the tv back on -- really pissy -- I said are you angry - she said no but she was
God help me !!
Sunny
If someone decides there is no goodness in you they won't be able to see it. I'll take a BLT over a MLC anyday !!!
My wife said let’s not buy for each other this year, we can count the new TV as our gift to us. I said ok, but I still might want to get you something else. Then I found an nice electric fireplace on Craigslist that I decided to get. Was planning on putting it out early x-mas morning, tagged to Me and Her from Santa, but she came home today earlier than I expected and seen it as soon as she walked in!
Oops. Merry Christmas I said. She didn’t act very excited but when I turned it on beside her later she seemed to enjoy it. We keep our thermostat set at 62 degrees.
Santa is still going to leave us stockings on X-mas morning.
Did you guys talk about gifting/not gifting for each other?
Since you normally buy for her AND you’ll be together on X-mas day, I say get her something small. If you don’t, and she got you something, you’ll feel like a mope. Better to have it covered, I think, just don't go overboard.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
I would say at the very least, get her something from your son. It couldn't hurt to get her something small too. I always say, I give gifts because I want to, not because I expect one in return. You can even tell her this if she gets all pouty about it.
Get her something you think she would like that wouldn't be interpreted as romantic. I got my H a pair of gloves that you can text with that have his favorite football team's logo on it. Since he texts even while shoveling snow, I'm sure it will come in handy!
I would go with a little something, no matter what I think you'll be glad that you did.
FY- what a wonderful idea with the fireplace! Sounds like it warmed up Ms. Grinch just a little bit. At least you will be on Santa's nice list this year, no matter what your wife thinks
Bomb January 2012 - doesn't feel the same about me
~ "There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit to its faith, hope, and endurance."
Sunny, Here are a few suggestions: a CD of her favorite music, scarf and gloves, her favorite house plant, has she mentioned any books that she might be interested in purchasing?
There are any number of non-personal things you can get her.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Hi Sunny! I am glad you brought this up as I was agonizing on what to do. I decided on a nice polo type shirt for my H and am keeping receipts for him to exchange it if he doesn't like it, naturally.
Snodderly's ideas seem perfect. Did you decide on anything?
FY, my H put an electric fireplace in the MBR last year and I absolutely LOVE it! What a thoughtful and attractive idea
Tvs, you are always so clever!!!!!
Me54/H47 '08 H is "done" March '12 H moved out Brink of D, December '12 2014 totally reconciled! ...... "I firmly believe in the...absolute possibility of marriage renewal." Jim Conway
Santa (me) left us new stockings Christmas morning. W seen them and said nothing. Showing her lack of excitement later in the morning she said "well, you want to do this now?" and "I knew you were up to something". She then pulled out some gifts for me. She's determined to not get too excited about the fireplace or any other gifts from me, but the gift she got for her gay coworker is just the bomb. She's mentioned several times what a great gift it was, and even showed me facebook pics of it in his home. That's ok.
We had a good time with my family on x-mas eve, and hers on x-mas day. She acts like a different person around others, is more open and allows herself to have fun. Again I've noticed new facial expressions, laughs, and comments that she never has made before. Funny how when we are alone she seems unhappy and has very little to say... yet she is still here.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
This is "normal", the acting one way with others and something different with you...she is probably in "ruminating" mode with you, funny thing is, they feel safest being that way with the LBS, with others they have to put on "the show".
Don't read too much into it, her reactions to your gifts, keep working on and being YOU.
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
