As of now I have been under phone counseling from a DB counselor since 3/15/2012 and I thank God for her everyday – she has helped me hang in there. Read the DR book by Michelle.
My wife asked me for a separation on 3/31/2012 she was so pissed and angry saying things like:
I don’t remember one day in my life when I loved you, I never loved you, I am dying to have sex just not with you etc. You are a loser you don’t make enough money anymore, I had made most of the money in our relationship up until about 2008 when my business failed. At that time she made good money and I was a stay home dad 3 days a week and I worked 2 jobs and I made about $40,000 a year. She never told me she was upset and hated the fact that she made more money than me. My wife had a very good job that paid her $100,000.00 per year. When she asked me for the separation she tried to get me to move out overnight. Well I didn’t move out and 2 months later she had a huge argument with the owner of her company and lost her job. Her bosses love my wife like a daughter she is one of the 1st 10 people they hired now the company has over 124 employees they gave her $5000 for our wedding and they paid for our honeymoon. They loved this girl.
This is the fall of her since then.
Asks for separation/divorce. Loses job. Starts smoking again after 10 years. Out drinking most weekends with a couple that has an open marriage Goes on vacation to her parents house for 10 days in august – she would never leave my son alone for 1 night now she leaves for 10 days. Opens a new credit card on 4/15/2012 by 6/30/2012 there is over $8000 in charges on it purchased are mostly cloths and shoes. She is up all night on the front porch smoking and playing video games. Still not working
Here is were it gets more confusing her parents come for a visit from 8/25/2012 to 9/10/2012 she told them she is divorcing me but they treat me like everything is normal. While there are here my wife says she wants a new kitchen so my father in law agrees to install one for her. He is coming back up in November to install it. He is coming up in March to install a new bathroom for us.
She has not mentioned divorce or separation since 7/18/2012. But when I go out she never asks where I am going ( nor do I ask her where she is going ) I stayed out overnight she never asked or cared where I was. If you see my other posts about her texts seems she is looking for a new man.
We still go to church every Sunday and spend Sundays together – she still comes to my parents house with me. She still accidently calls me babe but always corrects herself right away.
Here is my dilemma my sister in law is getting married on 10/20/2012 I am not invited to the wedding, she is like my sister too I know her since she was 16 years old. Additionally I want to see my son as he is the ring bearer. I want to go to the church so I am going to ask her to go. My DB counselor says I should ask and I should be there since she is STILL my wife no matter what she thinks. I am scared out of my mind to bring it up because it is pursueing and I don’t do that stuff anymore.
Those of you who have lived through this how do you deal with the up and down and all around
Funny she just called me at work and I asked who is this she got all pissed off and said – who is this ??? – Hmmmm
See what I a mean she is like a crazy person
Any advice of what I should do or not do in my situation we have not made love since 1/29/2012 and have not kissed since 3/30/2012 I know it ain’t all about sex but the no “ I love you’s” affection hugging touching or kissing has been very hard for me.
Thanks for you time !!
Sunny Me-49 W-41 M-9yrs T-15 6 year old boy She turned 40 and BAZINGA W gave me the ILYBINILWY speech - Oct 2011 next day she came out of it for a month like we were newly weds - Distant and cold from 12/11 to 1/12 I Don't love you at all 2/14/2012 I don't remember a day in my life when I loved you 3/31/2012 I want a divorce Threatening to call mediator since 6/2012 Still in the same house, separate bedrooms
If someone decides there is no goodness in you they won't be able to see it. I'll take a BLT over a MLC anyday !!!
