I am struggling not to email H. Today I found a prayer journal I kept at another time when we were having problems. I resumed using it today. I have also been spending a lot more time with children and girlfriends, and much less time isolating.
W (me): 40 H (WAS): 39 M: 4 Separated: almost a year (Blended family with kids on both sides, none together)
The prayer journal is helping me immensely. It is helping to restore positive feelings toward my H. Those positive raise my sd, though, which makes it even more difficult not to reach out to H.
W (me): 40 H (WAS): 39 M: 4 Separated: almost a year (Blended family with kids on both sides, none together)
Still have not heard anything from my husband, but he is providing more financially and I was told by a mutual aquaintance that he speaks highly of me. I am not doing a great job on going dark, but I do make sure communication sent is brief and positive. My angst about the situation has been minimal since I start prayer journaling. It gives me peace.
W (me): 40 H (WAS): 39 M: 4 Separated: almost a year (Blended family with kids on both sides, none together)
Husband has returned from combat zone but did not come home. I sent mail while he was gone. Now that he is back and still not receptive, I am going dark.
W (me): 40 H (WAS): 39 M: 4 Separated: almost a year (Blended family with kids on both sides, none together)
I really feel for you, this sounds like an extremely difficult situation. Unfortunately it sounds like there may be mental illness involved, and DBing is not really geared towards solving issues like that. And you can't really encourage him to seek help because he will just view it as nagging. If there's a mutual friend or family member that he respects you might talk to them to see if they can encourage him to get help.
That said, DBing can at least help you. The techniques will help you to detach and GAL with or without him and it sounds like you really need to separate yourself from his storm right now.
