I haven't been here for about 2 years. Came by to see some old friends and to let people know that better days are ahead.
I've been there. My story is on here somewhere. I've felt the pain, anguish, depression etc. My friends here helped me to realize that I could be a better man, husband, and father. I can see now how immature I was and I had to undergo a very painful growing process.
My success isn't defined by a restored marriage unfortunately. My success is defined by now being a person that truly knows how to love and to accept love. One that isn't afraid to communicate my needs and listening to the needs of others.
Lean on each other and help each other and be open to learning from each other. The benefits are priceless.
I really appreciate hearing things from a man's point of view. I will read your old threads.
My marriage will not be restored, we will be divorced here in a matter of days. But Im taking this opputunity to really work on myself and ressurect the person I always was and know I can be.
Well D Money, Your timing is perfect! I was just sitting here wondering how people get through this crap!
I'm pretty sure my success won't be defined by a restored marriage. My success will be defined by me not going crazy!
I'm glad you got through all this, grew and all.
I'll look for your old threads.
Getting through this is different for everyone. For me I came to a place of acceptance. As I began to "grow up" and mature I began to realize that some things that I accepted in my previous relationship just weren't acceptable to me anymore. Once you get to a place that you realize you don't need this person in your life to survive or be happy, it's very liberating.
I've dealt with other things in addition to what I went through with my XW that helped put things in perspective. I was wasting too much emotion and energy worrying about what my XW was doing instead of living life.
I live a modest lifestyle. I don't make a lot of money, but I'm truly happy with my life and who I am.
I left the board when I did because I felt that I was "stuck". I just needed to withdraw into myself for awhile and heal.
So it is no longer about "D Money"? Funny thing, I'm most worried about money. What I need to worry about really is having fun, enjoying life. Being around to make my grand daughters prom dresses and such!
I try not to waste my brain space on my H. The OW sure has been getting into my head, though!
I have gone out and done my best to GAL. H is bothered by this and complained about me having fun while he is "Making all the hard-earned money". I say whatever, I have spent many years not doing what i want, doing what I needed to do.
I hope you are unstuck and healed now!
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!