We went back to our home country for a visit last week. My wife only stayed 3 days -- had to come back "for work" she said. Coincidentally, I saw phone calls and texts coming into her phone that morning (way too early for business)... I suspected they were 'have a nice trip, I can't wait till you're back without your husband' type messages from her latest fling.
On our way to the airport, she told me I wasn't welcome to stay at her sister's place with her and our son, and that I should find somewhere else because she didn't want to sleep in the same bed as me (she moved to a separate room many months ago at home). I said if her sister advised me I wasn't welcome in her home, I'd go elsewhere. She did not ask her sister to do this, and in the end, we all stayed together (though she in a separate room (sneaked off there each night after her sister went to bed)).
I stayed on with my son after she left and had a nice visit with her family and mine.
Also had very encouraging job exploratory job interviews and it's looking good for employment back home in January, knock on wood.
When my wife picked me and my son up at the airport when we got back, she asked how my meetings went and I told her well. She got angry at this, asked why wouldn't I stay where we are now for another year so she could get more experience at her present job. I told her I wouldn't make concessions of the type you make for a partner if she wasn't committed to being my partner anymore.
She said she wasn't interested in returning to our home country, and would find a way to stay in her current job and travel back and forth. (She works for a company that is currently downsizing... they won't pay for travel and accommodation... she is in la la land... this is all about her social life here. It's shocking that her quest for male attention would be worth her sacrificing being in our son's life on a daily basis. I don't understand who she's become. **Sigh**).
Tonight, I checked her phone when she accidentally left it open beside me... saw lots of inappropriate messages from her latest BF (he's married with two kids). I know I shouldn't look... that it really just causes me pain and isn't worth it. But I did it, and I confronted her about what I'd found (I know this was a backslide and I should have acted "as if", but couldn't help myself.) She denied it... said it was innocent flirting... and it wouldn't matter anyway; why do I care?
I texted the guy. Told him I knew about their affair. Threatened to let his wife know about it, too. Got no response... didn't really expect one, but I hope he's having an anxious night.
Anyway, long story short, my wife was so angry she punched me in the eye. Guilt and shame manifesting in rage, if I believe what the Shrink says. She gave me a shiner and a cut that required suturing. So now I have to go to work in the morning with a black eye. Not sure what I'll tell my son in the morning when he asks about it.
I'm finished with this craziness. I don't need to keep finding out stuff that hurts me. I certainly don't need to be assulted. I deserve better, and so does my son. I think I will be the one to file for D.
I only hope I can find a sympathetic court who will give me primary custody to protect him from her reckless behaviour.
