Time for an Introduction...and Thanks

[Brian in Hville]

I'm glad your kids got to see him. I know how hard it is on them. Stay strong with the gym. It was helped me so much through my ordeal. I still love going.

At least you know what he is doing and who with. That should give you some idea abut what you want to do. I know, if she stays in his life, you will always resent the time she gets with him and your kids. But look at it like this. You deserve someone who is going to be by your side ALWAYS. Not leave you for some ho-bag at work. With the person you have become, you are going to find the most amazing love that will last because of this experience. That is what you deserve!!!!

Happy early Birthday. I know you'll have fun in Vegas! Just remember, you can't share with us the things you do there! LOL

I am doing fine. Was up, then down, then up again with this woman I met. I'm just enjoying getting to know her right now and sometimes spending a few moments with her. I had to remind myself to keep practicing the skills I learned here! They help in ALL relationships! I'd tell you a lot more, but just don't feel comfortable doing it for the whole world to see! lol

What's your plans for Christmas?

[figure-it-out]

I understand but am glad to hear you're enjoying the "newness" of your relationship! Guess it shows the whole DB thing is never really over. It's good to know you can apply it to all of your relationships going forward.

Oh I'm sure I will be able to share ALL of what goes on this Vegas trip. It will be as vanilla as it comes. I'd probably bore everyone to death.It will basically be cheer, cheer and more cheer. I do love my time with D though. It's our last cheer trip to this location at least so I'm really looking forward to it.

Yes, the GF. I'm looking forward to a day when she doesn't "matter" so much. I know it will come eventually, when I've truly "moved on" I guess. It just seems still so far away. Putting one foot in front of the other though and moving ahead.

Thanks for the birthday wishes!! As for my Christmas plans, I have NO idea. S informed me on Tues. that H told him he would have him Christmas evening. Uh, news to me. S said "dad said you guys worked out when he would have me". We DID speak about holidays when we discussed our settlement but the plan for Christmas was always he had access on Christmas eve as that's when his family traditionally celebrated and I would have them on Christmas as that's when my family celebrated. So, here's another conversation we'll have. I need to reinforce again to discuss these things with me first so we're on the same page.
Just another bridge to cross I guess.
Hope you're having a good day!!

[Brian in Hville]

I guess if you are going with your D, then it will be pretty tame! lol

Don't worry about moving on right now. You just keep working on yourself and the next thing you know, you'll be there! One thing I couldn't understand was just how much life I was missing! When you're married, you get comfortable (at least we did), and you stop doing some of the fun things. I now do things like go to Nashville some weekends (it's 1.5 hours away), plan events like visit caverns or really nice and scenic walking trails, go to different events like concerts or sports...I just love living life again!

I'm sure he will try to make you look bad (to the kids) by not discussing things with you first. Just stay calm though.

I hope you have a great day too!

[Brian in Hville]

FIO must be having fun or is busyt at work!

[figure-it-out]

Hey Brian,
Both I guess! Between meetings and getting ready for Vegas this weekend I'm trying to suff 5 days of work into 3! Looking forward to getting away though and spending time with my D.

Not much new to report on the H front. He will be staying at the house this weekend with S while I'm gone. Mixed feelings about this. He used to do this quite regularly before I found out he wasn't living with MIL anymore. On one hand I don't like the thought of him there as it isn't "his" home anymore. On the other hand, I am hoping a part of him settles in a little bit while he's there and misses what used to be. Thinking practically, it helps knowing the dogs are taken care of, etc. without me having to ask my neighbors or parents to take on more than they already do.

I still need to have the Christmas conversation with him, figure out the logistics. I spoke to D a little bit about it the other night. She is very concerned she won't see him for Christmas considering the dynamics between MIL and SIL now (so the usual Chrismas eve activities may be out) and because D has no desire to spend time at H's new place. Another bridge to cross I guess.

How are you doing? Any fun plans for the weekend??

[Brian in Hville]

Yeah, I understand how maybe him "missing" you and the life you used to have will creep up in his mind. There is a chance, but don't bank on it. It sounds like he still has a LONG ways to go till he get's himself right. You just concentrate on that trip with your D and enjoy it all!!! I am excited for you! LOL

Yes, when you come back have that talk with him. It will be good to get things settled about Christmas. Even though you aren't together now, communication is still VERY important.

I'm not doing much this weekend. A movie tonight with my bud and a Church event on saturday with a few people. Going Sunday to another friends daughters ice skating play then taking me best friends girlfriend Christmas shopping. Ok, maybe I am doing a lot!

Have a ton of fun and tell us all about it when you get back! Start a new thread!!!

Brian

[Brian in Hville]

How was vegas and Christmas????