To be honest though, in order to know some of the details of my sitch, you would have to read back some, and if you haven't been around for a while, well, I wouldn't expect you to do that...
My S is an adult. Starting college in January. Possibly off to the military in two years. We have yet to see where his journey is going to take him...It may very well bring him closer to me in the future...
That is his road and his choice...
Is it hard? Harder than you can imagine. Wouldn't be any different though if he had left and I had stayed...
However that was not a part of my journey...
The location that I lived in, was not where I was meant to be. I have known that, as long as I lived there. I stayed initially out of fear and further down the road, out of convience. Then out of compromise to what others wanted.
As the MLC crazy train left the station a second time, I decided then that the ONLY way I would remain there, was if my STBX did a huge turn around. Which was not likely to happen. I started looking at me, what I needed and wanted in MY life. And what I would need in order to make my life a happy one for me.
My answers, started with location. With environment. With nature and nurture. To nurture my soul, to have peace within, my surroundings on the outside, needed to change. To mountains, seasons, snow, colored leaves, the quietness that comes as winter settles in and animals and plants go into hibernation. Then spring comes, and everything is reborn, fresh and new. Rejuvinated. That doesn't really happen in Florida. So my time there was coming to an end and I was fully aware of that fact.
Anyway, my son and I are finding a new kind of relationship. One that is of mother and child but also of mutual respect of two grown people. One that will be filled with visits and new experiences for us both.
The signifigant other that you mentioned, is simply a bonus in my life. He had nothing to do with the journey I took through MLC, and nothing to do with where the house landed for me, however, hopefully he will continue to be a part of the journey I continue to take...
If not, I will be ok. My life, my happiness,my journey, is dependent on only one person, and that is me.
If you have learned anything on your journey through Oz, I am sure that you are aware that MLC brings us changes that we may never have imagined. Experiences that we may never have thought were possible. Sometimes it shows us where our line in the sand is. Sometimes, it does not. However, our lives may never look again as we once thought they should...
Our answers, are not always what we believed they were.
And our acceptance of that, is not a bad thing.
I hope life brings you peace.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
Nothing I write would express what I want to say...
So I will just say...
I wish you nothing but the best!
Oh...and can you please confirm that I am not in the bonehead club.
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
YBR, I have the pleasure of being able to call Cat my friend. And I know that any of her decisions were made with the utmost care. She is a wonderful mother and great human being.
I am not sure what purpose it served for you to question her as you did about her decisions.
While we need to certainly keep it real on here, we also should take care to do treat each other with kindness and respect.
I read this as Cat doing something for herself when her son was on solid ground and she is not getting between S and her ex. I think YBR agreed after reading the post.
Did I miss something?
Safe travels Cat. Wherever life takes you
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
Whoa there Brookie.... Not sure what you thought you read but I simply asked a question and Cat was gracious enough to answer it for me. Meow.... Put your claws away!
YBR, anyone who knows me here or in RL knows there are no claws EVER from me.
Sometimes it is hard to read what someone is trying to say when it is written.
Just kinda thought, knowing how hard it was for Cat to move, that your questions below might have upset her. Sorry if I misunderstood.
You have moved with your dog to another state to live with your significant other and your son is still at home with your husband? Isn't that really hard? How are you able to handle not seeing your kid every day