An epilogue, or epilog, is a piece of writing at the end of a work of literature or drama, usually used to bring closure to the work.
So I wanted to start this thread with some words of wisdom and to share with all of you something I have been writing for a while but work and life has gotten in the way so I have not finished what I wanted to write.
In the meantime there has been so much contact that I am falling behind so before it gets away from me I would like to share it with you guys.
I think most of you guys remember our last exchange and nothing really happened for awhile at least not until she texted on the 14th.
X: Hi....Can I call u tonight? I have a question for u....
M: Yup
X: In 45 min is that alright?
M: Yup
X: K
Honestly I don't remember what this conversation was about. I think it had to do with my D but I can't recall.
July 19th
I called her to find out when she wanted to see D
M: hey I was just wondering if the dates you gave me for the 21-22 were still solid of if there is a change of plans?
X: I don't know yet. I am working on it. When I know you will know. The other Assistant Manger is going on vacation but I am not sure when she will be back. I will let you know
M: K thanks
She was kind of snooty on this convo
I went out to dinner with a friend and she called while I was out. I had the cell on vibrate and did not hear it go off. A little while into dinner I checked the phone and I had a miss call from her and a text
X: Can you answer?
M: Oh I am sorry I missed your call. Phones on vibrate didn't hear it. I'll call you back in a bit
X: Ok
I called her back after dinner.
M: Whats up?
X: sorry did not mean to be nasty. I am working on the dates maybe the following Thurs and Friday will work better. Maybe it will be more than those two days
M: thats ok. More than two days? You going to get the weekend?
X: No I am talking to my boss and I am leaving this job. I am going back home to stay with my mom
M: really?? I thought you liked Tulsa
X: I can't afford it anymore. Tulsa is nice but I need to go home. I tried to run before I could walk. I don't want to be here anymore.
M: Are you ok?
X: yeah just need to put my pride aside. I just have to regroup and go home till I can get my head above water. I wanted to be too independent too fast and its not worth it. I need to go home and be around my friends and my family.
M: I am sorry I was hoping Tulsa would work out for you
X: Are you just saying that?
M: Now X when have you known me to say things just because it is what you want to hear? I have always said what I feel and this is no different
X: Thank you then. I am just making sure cause if you did not mean it then it would just be mean.
M: No I mean it
At this point we talked about different things and she started to bait me into an argument. She was talking about debt and all the CC debt she had because of me. I just listened and politely reminded her that is why I took on the IRS because it was the agreement.
While talking to her my phone began to beep cause I was getting another call
X: Well it sounds like someone is calling so i will let you go
M: It's my dad he is in the hospital so yes I have to take this
X: Ok good night
I said good night and that was that.
A few minutes later I get a text from her
X: I am sorry about your dad I hope everything is alright
M: Thank you. He's not doing well, going into surgery tomorrow. Should recover though. Thank u again
X: U should be there
X: Ur Welcome
M: I know........I'm waiting till the after the surgery but I'm ready to go if need be
X: U shouldn't be waiting for that news to go...U should just go
M: $$$
X: Well that is too bad...I will be thinking about him
X; Priorities
July 21
X: How's your dad?
M: Waiting for hear from the Dr. He's feeling better though
M: Thanks
X: Ok just wanted to check. I'm thinking about him
M: He appreciates it, as do I
July 27th
I am away that week in training for the military. While administering a test to a candidate she calls. I did not answer but about 45 minutes later I called her back.
She was very friendly and nice on the phone.
X: Hey I wanted to see if tomorrow was ok to pick up D
M: Yeah it should be fine. What time were you thinking?
X: About 11 is that ok
M: Yeah sounds good. I need to call her to make sure she is around but I will confirm with you later on ok?
X: Sure.....where are you?
M: I am in VA
X: oh what are you doing up there?
M: EIB (Expert Infantry Badge Army Course) I am an instructor
X: Oh nice. How does it feel to be on the other side
M: It feels great. No pressure
X: Yeah I bet. Are you having fun?
M: Yeah it is a good time
We talked a little more about the training and she asked some questions. Told her about a guy I cut a break to in the testing that day
X: That was very nice of you. Good for you. I am sure he appreciated it
Then talked a few more and I told her about a parachuting competition I am going to in RI. don't remember how that came into the convo
X: Oh wow. That is nice you have a chance to go back to that in recruiting. Be careful...Is it like riding a bike? Jumping out of a plane..
M: LOL I am not sure. I will let you know
X: LOL
Talked a few more minutes and then I told her I had to go.
I called OK and found out D was actually with her aunt. She had been picked up the day before and was not do back until late in the afternoon the next day when X wanted her.
I called aunt and left a message to see if she had a time she would bring D back but no answer.
Same day Later on in the day.
She called but I was busy so I did not answer. Called her back about 40 minutes later no answer so i send a text
M: I called back no answer
She called
X: I just talked to your sister and she said she has no idea when D will be back.
M: Yeah I heard. I called aunt and did not get anybody but as soon as she calls me I will let you know so that I can tell you
X: well your sister said she had not idea. I told you I wanted to see her.
M: And you will, but I had no idea she was with aunt. I've been busy with this training and did not talk to today so I did not know. That is why I called aunt
X: Somebody is BSing me. You say she will be back tomorrow but your sister does not know anything. I think it is pretty screwed up that she is not even there. I am coming from Tulsa to see her.
M: And you will. Maybe not 11 but early afternoon
X: That is screwed up that I have to call and check with you before I have to see D and yet aunt does not. What has she ever done for her. Wow. that is so fked up. Whatever just let me know one way or another.
M: That is her aunt.....I just said I will call her to find out the times
X: I told you weeks ago. I said i would see her that I wanted to yet the day before aunt takes her and no one can give me an answer as to when she is going to be back. If she does not get back in time I will not be able to see her so don't go around blaming me. I have till Friday and that’s it
M: Listen, I will call if she can bring D back then she can if you can't see her then no worries. If it is that much of a inconvenience don't worry about it
X: That is not the point I told you and I have to go through you to see her but aunt does not. I only have two days that is it.
M: Ok sweet heart
At this point she got really pi$$ed and cut me off
X: Don't call me sweetheart!! I am NOT your freaking sweetheart!!
Nothing else she was saying was really pi$$ing me off just kind of annoying me. This one comment though got me going
M: Oh I KNOW you are NOT my sweetheart. You have made that very clear so no need to clarify that for me. A slip of the tongue I assure you it won't happen again
X: I don't need your sarcasm
M: I was not sarcasm
X: That is what is sounded like
This went on for a while and from here the conversation turned into an argument. I told her I did not file I did not leave and I did not move in with anybody
She said that after ten years she did not trust my changes to be true and she fought also but while she was right here next to me. She also said
X: I cried myself to sleep so many times and you never saw that. How do you not see that? How do you not know your wife is crying out for you?
M: I don't know how but it happened. Look I have said I was sorry so many ways I lost count. I did everything I could to repair this. You chose to finish it off and I am sorry for that. I am sorry for you and I am sorry for me but there was nothing I could do.
Back and forth back and forth
M: Maybe it is better not to even talk cause all we are doing is arguing, you are getting upset and I am getting upset and it is pointless.
X: Ok I guess
Until she said she had to go cause she was working
I told her I would text her the times for D and she hung up.
A few minutes later I get this text
X: I'm at work...I can't talk....But u are hurtful and mean, and I don't deserve it.
X: If u want to finish this conversation I can call you when I get off work
M: I'm sorry you felt I was being hurtful and mean X, it was not my intent
X: It's never ur intent but it always happens. It just comes easy to you...No one can hurt me the way u can...I thought I was passed that...U just proved me erin
X: Wrong...NOT Erin...Stupid fking phone
A few minutes later
X: So congratulations u still have the ability to break my heart all over again
M: A "badge" of distinction" I never wanted. If I've hurt you then I am sorry
X: Sure you are
M: What do you feel was mean or nasty
X: And u made it clear long before I did that I was not your sweetheart
X: Oh here we go again...What did you do?? It must be the way I took it. It was my misunderstanding. You didn't mean it!..UGH!!! U make me want to scream X...
That was around 9:30PM
At 10:11 PM I respond
M: Is tomorrow at 1 ok with you?
X: Fine
M: She will be at my nieces house just text her when your outside and I hope you guys have a good time.
X: Where does your niece live?
M: Address
X: K
About an hour later she called and I was out to dinner. It was the first time I had eaten all day since I was an instructor at this school I had 0 time to do anything and the restaurants were a good hour away from our base
X: I wanted to talk to you about our earlier convo are you busy
M: Well I am eating dinner right now with a bunch of people but I can call you back if you like, when i get back
X: Ok sorry to bother you
M: No bother, I will just call you back
She was driving from Tulsa to her home town which is about 1.5 hours away. About 20 minutes later I get a text
X: Just letting you know if you call I'll be on the road another hour so u can call if you choose
M: I am driving back to the base. Restaurant is 45 min away but I have people in the car
X: Ok I understand. U can try if u want, but maybe there isn't anything more to talk about. I can't keep arguing with you. I will pick D up at 1 tomorrow
M: Would you like to call X cause I just got here
X: Yeah go ahead
I called. This next convo lasted about 45 min but it was somber and not a whole lot was said. I will only mention the parts I remember
M: Why are you moving home?
X: I am sick of this apartment and I need to be around my family and friends. I hate it here and I want to go home
M: OM will be disappointed.
X: I don't give a crap about his feelings or what he thinks. I need to worry about me and take care of myself and not worry about other people. Why do you say that?
M: Well he is losing half the rent. That is what you are right? Rent buddies.......
X: His problem not mine. I want to go home. And like I have said before whatever you think we were, we weren't.
M: Weren't...Interesting choice of words
X: Weren't, aren't, never were whatever
X: Who is taking care of the dog?
M: A friend
X: What friend?
M: A blah blah blah in the army
X: Really? Hmmmm.........What's her name
(I never mentioned it was a woman)
M: Her name is $^%#&
X: Oh nice
M: Her and her BF are taking care of the dog
X: LOL I am just giving you chit X I don't care
Talked a few more minutes and that was that.
July 28th
X calls but I am giving out a test so I text her
M: Testing give me 20
X: Ok was just gonna let u know I am cleaning my car out so may be 1:30 before I get D, but not later
M: No prob
X: Thank you
That was it. Later that day I get a pic of my D hands she painted her fingernails
X: D painted fingernails...Red with green n blue sparkles!!!!!
M: Looks great
An hour later I get a call I did not answer was conducting a briefing. I called her no answer, she calls right back I was in the shower
So I get a text
X: Tried calling right back....no answer
X: U can call back
I was busy at this point getting ready for the next series of test so about an hour later I called and no answer. So I sent her a text
X: I called you back
She called
Conversation was pleasant she told me all about her day with D and what they did. Sounded good. told me she had to answer some hard questions. Hung up and I went to dinner
After dinner I sent her a text
M: Hey just wanted to say thank you for showing D a good time and taking her tomorrow. I know I don't always have the friendliest phone voice but I am glad you got to see each other
No response to the next day mid afternoon
X: You’re welcome. Thanks for letting me see her. I am glad we got to see each other too. Sorry my phone died.
X: Did you talk to your mom?
M: Yeah I told her the times
X: Thank you
Around 5:20 same day I get a call from her again
She received a text from my D asking when she would be there because everyone was waiting on her
X: I am going to vent to you so if I sound nasty I am sorry in advance. I know D did not send that text I know when people put words in her mouth. I have not treated your family like this that is why I talk to you I don't need this crap.
M: So you think D sent the text?
X: No I know it's me. It's always me. I said I would be there between 5-5:30 I am leaving now. I don't need to put up with this, you understand.
This went on for about 5 minutes but I was so shocked by her anger that I did not say a word. She hung up and I went to go eat.
I called my family and they had dinner plans at 6 and by 5:45 X had not arrived which is why they were checking on her arrival but D did send the text.
July 30th
She called I did not answer I was busy again but I did call her back a few hours later no answer. I sent her a text
M: I called back
X: I see that…sorry I’m at work..unable to talk right now. Can either call u tonight, or another day which you prefer?
M: Up to u
X: Not sure if your busy tonight or need to go to bed early, so it’s really up to you
M: I’m driving home tonight; EIB is over so going back to Jersey. Whenever you want
X: Just can’t answer the question huh? Ok I will call u tonight
X: I’ll be late is that ok?
M: Yeah that’s cool. I will prob still be driving
X: K
She called but I will still driving with people in the car so she did not want to talk. She said she would call back next day I said ok
July 31
She called
X: You know I spent all night thinking about this the other night. I don’t want to argue with you X. I am don’t want you mad at me or me mad at you. I forgive you and I am not mad at you. Being mad at you is not doing us any good. If we need to talk I think we should make it as pleasant as possible
M: I agree X. I am not mad either and I am not meaning to be mean to you
X: You have your own way of being mean.
M: I will respond to but not tonight. Maybe tomorrow or the next day or some time.
X: Why not tonight
M: I am just not in a position to respond right now
X: OK
Aug 1st I get an email from her, it’s one of those junk emails that people send about send to 5 people and your wish will come true
A few hours later I replied
M: What did you wish for?
X: It doesn’t work lol I wished for my boss to come take my keys so I don’t have to work the last 2 weeks and just go back home now. LOL what did you wish for
Later that night I replied
M: Yeah your right it doesn’t work
X: What did you wish for? LOL
Text from her around 10:30
X: I am off work
Aug 2nd
I reply to the email
M: Amnesia. LOL
X: Wow….LOL
Text from her this morning
X: Oh there is something else D spoke about that I think u should know…
M: Sorry I missed your text I went to bed early and figured u were asleep still….What’s that?
X: I will explain when u call
M: K at base all day…..Tonight? Is Ok?
X: That’s fine
X: Have a good day. Was 116 degrees here yesterday
M: That’s terrible
X: yup…it’s 10:30 now and 99 degrees
M: Good grief
I did not think this post would ever end.
I will give my thoughts but just wanted to list the facts first cause this thing is getting ridiculous.
Too long, you lost me, sorry. Hope you are doing well!
STarsky
Yeah I guess it is.
Here is the short version
Contact increased not sure why
LOL -- thanks. I'll try to read it all later when I get a chance, but an "Executive Summary" would be nice. Maybe something in-between 5,000 words and 5?
LOL -- thanks. I'll try to read it all later when I get a chance, but an "Executive Summary" would be nice. Maybe something in-between 5,000 words and 5?
Starsky
hahahaaa....
Meanwhile, back at the 2step ranch... the livestock continued to be acutely aware the farm hands were not done with each other... yet...
u know im one of your bits to the end and i disagree with many here that your post is too long. You have a knack for remembering details and then having the patience to write them down. Tha gives us the readers the full picture which is sooooo necessary in these accounts as even a missed twitch is telling.
I have read your post twice and I do apologize that i cant give you the insight that you may require except for something that i have said for some time. She is not done with you and she is slowly starting to realize that life without 2step is not all its cracked up to be.
You are doing the right thing by being patient. Keep sarcasm in check when you can , mostly listen. I think she wants to be heard above all else. I have recently read the 5 languages and it is a good read.\
You will do the right thing 2 step, because that is who you are.\
sorry i cant comment more, even on my own sitch which has taken another turn but i dont seem to have the desire to write it down.
Maybe I will soon.\\
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BITS M-46 W-42 M-16y T-19 y s10 s15 BombDec.19/09 Sep-F16/10 Sep Papers signed by W- June 30/10 Recon July 5/10 PA foundOut- Oct 30/10 Mental HospNov/10 moved out Nov/10 Leg Sep Mar 15/11
