H has left me four times. The last time was after he picked me up from the airport from burying my mother. I dont know if I want to divorce bust anymore but it helps to gain others perspective. I found out over the weekend, that h is posting pics on dating sites. I am disgusted at the man he has become. We have no children, so I have basically went dark. We are living apart but in another state from our family. I am in the process of making the painful decision to move back home and away from him. I need to be around my family and I do have a job here but nothing else. Somehow, I feel guilty leaving him here and moving back home but I love the old h, not the one that I see now. Kee
Kee, without knowing more all I can say is that anyone leaving you 4 times, and putting pics up on dating sites, isn't someone I could be with and feel safe/healthy with.
I guess the question/comment is, they say the definition of insanity is repeating the same behavior and expecting different results. So, You took him back each time and he hurt you again...so, what's going to be different now?
How are you going to take care of yourself this time?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Yes, I know! I am done working in 2 weeks. I have a ticket to go home May 29th. I am planning on moving home and starting over. I cant feel safe or healthy with him. However, I can feel all of these at home. Thats what is different! I have went dark and am making plans for my future. I hope to go back to school again, once I find a job back home.
Kee, I think you are making a good step towards focusing on you and your future. If your H is still doing the MLC behaviors, and you seem so spent from all of it - I believe you are making a great decision.
You must do what is right for you. Our sitch's sound awfully familiar. My H is out for the 3rd time and is just not the same H that I married and had a great 13 yrs with before his crisis.
I am proud of you for being able to say you recognize that he is just a different person now. And not an admirable one, just the same as my H. The whole town thinks he is going crazy.
Keep in touch after you move. I know your not in the DBing mode anymore, But you can still be of guidance to others,and you can share new updates on your move here with us. It may bring inspiration to others that are thinking of doing the same. If you were brought up in a loving and good family I think it will do you a world of good. And going back to school will open up all sorts of new horizons for you.
Yes, I know! I am done working in 2 weeks. I have a ticket to go home May 29th. I am planning on moving home and starting over. I cant feel safe or healthy with him. However, I can feel all of these at home. Thats what is different! I have went dark and am making plans for my future. I hope to go back to school again, once I find a job back home.
Wow, something in you just said, "NO MORE CRAZY, I WANT TO HAVE PEACE NOW" and you are doing it! You are making it for you. Good for you.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Forgive me. I am not making fun of your situation in the least, but what you said made me think, how pathetic is that, putting your face on a dating website when you are still married just to see if anyone out there finds you the least bit attractive? Too bad you aren't able to hack in and change his status. If you find a way, I'll be glad to write it for you. Hehehe (my evil laugh)
Glad you have the option/opportunity to get as far away from his craziness as possible. It sounds like just the opportunity so many here would have benefited from. I, too, was lucky in that my XH was stationed in another place, so I didn't have to see him much at all.
Sounds to me like you are on the right track girl. Good luck.
Tipper, Right now i am not in the DB mood. I am just to numb from his leaving me 4 times. He called and left a message the other day saying over and over I must be counting down the days until work is over. He said he wanted to see me before I left. I fowarded a copy of his dating profile to him and said not to call me. His whole family thinks he is crazy like people think of your h. I want to remain here because it helps me get my feelings out. Thanks for your response1 kee
25yearsMLC, Yes, I want peace now. I want to go to my moms gravesite and talk to her and cry and try to heal. Its such a scary move but i leave in 8 days. thanks for your response! Kee
Punkin, Found out its not his face but his body. I am disgusted and feel more betrayed then ever before. He is on tons of sex dating sites now. He called me the other day and my response was to send what he posted in his profile word for word. Cruel but I needed him to know that i know and am so over his game playing. Maybe, we cam write a good response sometime!!! Thanks for your support! Kee
H called today and said good morning beautiful, lets have breakfast. I reminded him of his sex sites and dating sites. His response was what can I say????? I have not spoke to him since because I feel that he cannot understand through this fog, how hurt and betrayed I am. I will not let him abuse me nor my love. This is what I have done different then before.
